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Reconciliation :
OW quit her job today

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helpless

 RedRose (original poster member #39584) posted at 2:30 AM on Wednesday, August 14th, 2013

WH continued to work with OW, but today she gave her notice and said she wouldn't be back. Why am I not happier? While I am glad she won't have reason to see him all the time, she still lives near his work (an hour away from where we live). I feel automatically suspicious that this is a way for the A to go underground, instead of just being elated that we can finally be done with her. I hate living with suspicion all the time

BW-37
WH - 38
2.5 year LTA
2nd A 2/20/16

posts: 164   ·   registered: Jun. 18th, 2013
id 6447346
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jjsr ( member #34353) posted at 3:12 AM on Wednesday, August 14th, 2013

Well what tells you that the A might go underground. Is your husband displaying signs that he is still cheating? I don't know your story.

Me: BS
Him: WS
Married since 1985
Parents to 2 adult sons and 3 of the cutest cats you have ever seen
D-day 8/6/11 Truth about ONS and 9/21/11 Truth about EA and 10/28/15 NEW dday.
Just surviving.

posts: 1849   ·   registered: Dec. 31st, 2011   ·   location: midwest now.
id 6447426
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mchercheur ( member #37735) posted at 3:17 AM on Wednesday, August 14th, 2013

(((RedRose)))

I understand. My WH still works in the same building as OW, altho they no longer sit next to each other every day all day.

I am guessing we will never 100% trust them again.

I am hoping for you that she is finally out of your life, & that you & your WH can start a new chapter.

Me: BW; Him: WH --Had 10 mo. EA/ PA with COW; Dday 5/2011 Married 35 years/Together 36 years/4 kids together, and 1 grandbaby; OW 20 years younger than us/divorced no kids Trying to R; don't know what the final outcome will be

posts: 2687   ·   registered: Dec. 7th, 2012
id 6447435
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AML04 ( member #39682) posted at 1:14 PM on Wednesday, August 14th, 2013

I wish OW would quit!!! But I can see how this could also make you uncomfortable. I truly hope your H isn't giving you any reason to think this might happen. I know it's hard but try to look at it positively.

Good luck!

Me-BS Him-WH DS 5/12
Met 2000, Married 2004
DDay 5/26/13, TT through 8/13
2.5 yr EA w/co-worker, PA 12/12 to 4/13
Hopeful for R

posts: 876   ·   registered: Jun. 27th, 2013   ·   location: MA
id 6447789
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still-living ( member #30434) posted at 1:38 PM on Wednesday, August 14th, 2013

My wife quitting her job was one of the best days of my life, and our recovery rapidly improved after she did.

posts: 1822   ·   registered: Dec. 17th, 2010
id 6447811
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 RedRose (original poster member #39584) posted at 2:28 PM on Wednesday, August 14th, 2013

My story, in a nutshell - WH had an EA turned PA with a coworker for two years. I found out in December, and the A went underground until July. He hasn't given me any reason to believe that it has continued since then, has been transparent for the first time, and was very clear to OW about NC, which he hadn't done before. So, I do think he is doing everything right at this point. I just expected to be thrilled that she quit - and I am happy - just hope that it isn't too good to be true!

[This message edited by RedRose at 8:29 AM, August 14th (Wednesday)]

BW-37
WH - 38
2.5 year LTA
2nd A 2/20/16

posts: 164   ·   registered: Jun. 18th, 2013
id 6447867
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Scubachick ( member #39906) posted at 8:07 PM on Wednesday, August 14th, 2013

Red Rose,

I understand completely! My husband fired her and I rehired her (although at the time I only had part of the truth). I was conflicted because I thought at least I can keep my eye on her but at the same time I hated that she was still there. If she quit I would never know where she was or what she was up to. I bet your husband is happy she quit!

posts: 1825   ·   registered: Jul. 23rd, 2013
id 6448465
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