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Newest Member: Mrpink (61487)

User Topic: I keep effing up.
♂ 39919
Member # 39919
Stop  Posted: 12:28 PM, August 14th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am so effing stupidÖ..I want to do everything I can to save my marriage, the one I have completely destroyed. My marriage, my family, everything destroyed. I have come clean with everything, although she doesnít believe me. Now, I give her even more reason to keep that mindset. Last night a ONS texted me out of the blue. I have no information on the ONS but apparently she still had mine. Needless to say I panicked and just told her ďcanít talkĒ. Where I should have said Never ever contact me again, I love and only want to be with my wife. So lose all my shit. Bottom line is I didnít slam the door shut. WTF is wrong with me. I donít give a shit about this ONS. Donít even think about it. Why didnít I do that last night, Why didnít I tell my wife right then when it happened. Why did my brain shutdown. I TT in the beginning but have come clean, I have nothing to hide. I am so lost in what to do. My BS is getting a STD test today and on top of me being a total Dumbass, I canít even see why she is giving me a second chance.

Married 13yrs
DD July 13,2013
6 month EA 2-ONS

Posts: 23 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Phx
♀ 16024
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 12:42 PM, August 14th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

When we lie and deceive for so long it's hard to break the habit. When something like this happens you're going to have to train yourself to take a second and think. Think about what your new reaction should be.

The first thing you should have done was tell your wife. Then the two of you should have decided together how to handle it.

It takes a little while to shake ourselves out of the fog. What you do is you keep being honest and put the M first. Don't react with old cheating habits. Think first.

"If you want to know who your tribe is, speak your truth, then see who sticks around. Those are the people who get a spot in your blanket fort." -Nanea Hoffman

Posts: 55120 | Registered: Sep 2007
♂ 36140
Member # 36140
Default  Posted: 11:24 AM, August 18th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

jrr111800 Id just like to add something, you have to tell the ons that its over and you have to break all contact once and for all. Maybe look at changing your number!

Stand with your BW and offer support when and where you can when you get the results of the std test, yes it is humiliating and shocking but you will pass through this. I have been there and Im still standing. Keep telling the truth no matter how it hurts, the more TT the more damage it causes.

M-12 yrs
2 sons
D-Day 20th May 2012
EA/PA July-October 2008 FUGLY COW

Posts: 24 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: U.K.
Topic Posts: 3

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