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phoenixrivers posted 8/15/2013 00:07 AM

I've been preoccupied with putting out the OM fires that have been burning lately (fired from his job for drug abuse and threatening to "take down" the WGF). Those fires have largely been quelled and now I find myself having second thoughts about the WGF.

Lied repeatedly to me about her A. Said she used protection the first time I asked her on 12/21/12 (said she did, but didn't and never did through the A which lasted until 6/13). Told him she loved him, while coming home to me and saying the same things.

Her reassurances that she "loves" me sound like so much empty bs now. She said those same things to me while she was sleeping with him and telling him she loved him.

I'm confused and upset. I'm going to IC tomorrow and plan on bringing this up. For now has anyone had a successful R after so many lies and so much deceit?

[This message edited by phoenixrivers at 12:09 AM, August 15th (Thursday)]

AStar posted 8/15/2013 03:02 AM

I am sorry for your pain phoenixrivers.
It takes two people who genuinely believe in their relationship to R.
You both need to want to have an honest future together.
Only you can know if you two are both ready to do this.
Trust your heart, trust your gut on your assessment of readiness to R.
It will mean that anything to do with the OP needs to be cut from your life. The OP can not be your focus- I like the SI term of OP goes under the bus...
You two need to focus on you two only and your relationship for R to work.
Hopefully some more enlightened SI souls can give you better advice.
Take care of yourself phoenixrivers.

phoenixrivers posted 8/15/2013 05:22 AM

Thank you AStar; don't need to be regular to be empathetic.


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