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MC and IC at the same time??

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Smileemptysoul posted 8/15/2013 10:11 AM

I am curious to know people's thoughts on this. There is no set of rules or manual on how to deal with all of this crap. Every individual and couple's circumstances are completely different. But I really wonder what has been successful for people and what not so much, when it comes to MC and IC. We have had our first MC session with the next booked for the weekend. It has already been discussed there and agreed to by myself that I need IC as well to address and work on a whole pile of issues that have come to light since our lives were turned upside down last week. Issues that I desperately need to work on and fix if I have any hope of saving my marriage, and if that's not possible, to make myself a better person for the future.

Should we be concentrating on 'US' with the MC? Or should I be working on 'ME' with IC right now? Or is it beneficial to have the two working in conjunction? And if so, do you think that it would a good idea to use the same counselor for both or would having a fresh perspective from somebody else be a better idea?

KBeguile posted 8/15/2013 18:31 PM

Heart and I are fortunate in that both of us have IC and MC with the same person. And he's flexible enough to flip between IC-mode and MC-mode at a moment's notice. And we both really like him and thinks he has wonderful insights.

It's really a function of all the personalities involved and the particulars of the situation, but I'm just here to say that it IS possible to do all three with the same person.

authenticnow posted 8/15/2013 18:35 PM

Heart and I are fortunate in that both of us have IC and MC with the same person. And he's flexible enough to flip between IC-mode and MC-mode at a moment's notice. And we both really like him and thinks he has wonderful insights.
That was exactly our experience. It worked really well.

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