My wife took a couple of out of town trips. I thought I would freak out when it happened. The funny thing was, just the opposite happened. I was given a respite from all of the drama. You know what, it felt damned fine.
She expected me to call her every hour and I didn't call at all. I figured if she wanted to talk to me she'd call. And...she did, often.
If you think about it, the thing that gives you the most anxiety (her leaving you) is only a threat as long as she is there. What I am saying is if there is another D-day and you decide that you will be single if that happens (which I did) then the anxiety is gone if it happens. There is resolution. Right now you are scared of the unknown. When it becomes known it's power is gone.
My unknown was that my wife would leave me and I would be by myself. I found out when she was gone for a week I was fine.
So... I know if she leaves I'll be ok. I feel that you will be the same way. You are scared of what you don't know. You will probably find that when you are alone that it's like laying down a burden. You get to leave the drama behind.
You are dragging around an anchor. "You" choose to do it because of the abiding love that you still have for your wife. That being said, nothing changes the fact that it feels good not to drag the anchor around.
This is how I describe what happened to me, to my wife. I said "imagine a pond. You threw a rock into the pond. Once the rock hit the water (D-day) your action was complete and your ability to change the outcome had passed. I am the pond your action will ripple through me for years. I don't know when the ripples will stop or what I will be like when they do. Always remember, you threw the rock".
Sorry to drag on and be a bit abstract but it's how I've thought about it.
Best of luck to you.