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I just wanted to take a minute to post and say, "I hate my dipshit STBXH." He's a fucking moron. Like....getting drunk and having an accidental ONS is one thing. Like, maybe it's stupid. Going online actively seeking an AP is fucked up. He made the choice to have an A before he even left the house. He's pathetic and I want to vomit when I think of all the times I used to let him touch me. Thank God we haven't Fed in months. That guy sucks. I just want to be free!!!

Just wanted to let you know I hear you loud and clear Blindsided. Cheater are definitely Fu@ked up!

It's all about them, These guys are guilty of a lot more than infidelity. They are manipulators and cowards.

What kind of moral callousness flows through another human being’s blood to actually want to put someone else through such tortuous pain?

I know!! I am so pissed. He needs to stop coming over. I've stopped answering the door. The doorbell is annoying, but less so than dealing with his pathetic ass. We can both do better!! We just have to be strong right now. I keep telling myself that it's better for me to hurt this one last time than it is for me to hurt for my whole lifetime. Keep telling yourself that it's worth the pain because IT IS THE LAST TIME.

Nearly ExH did this, too. Sat right in the house we built together and created online profiles, hid porn and hid texting when he "got lucky".

Rewrote our marriage into a bad one to justify his lack of boundaries and then defended his and OW's actions to me and yelled at me.

Now if confronted, tries to minimize or catch me at something he can discredit me for.

The ultimate was when we woke up several times and he was gone, snuck out in the middle of the night and we know to where. His own wife and child, abandoned.

You know, before he snuck out the first time, he even pulled the snuggling and "I love you's" before he shut out the lights and destroyed our lives.

How could someone look someone in the eye and say those three words, in our marital bed, and know what he was going to do, at the same time?

I'm glad that you're in an anger phase-it's not healthy either, but there's fuel in it, isn't there?

Hi, Ashland,
That's terrible!! I hate that crap!! When mine started acting that way, it was the catalyst for me to check his web history. Now, I hate him just as much as he hates himself. The problem is, he CHOSE to do this, just like yours, and I just got screwed over. It's ridiculous that I have to have the most pain when I didn't do anything to deserve it!! I was so good to him, as I'm sure you were or you wouldn't be here, and I hate him for how he treated me. I hate myself for not leaving earlier. I know it's irrational, but I wanted this to work so badly.

Just wanted to say I stopped and read because I like your topic title. It is a rollercoaster to be sure, and I feel that way so many times even though we are supposed to be working it out. I cuss him under my breath. I want to super glue his hands to his genitals. What vile human beings he and his OW are. I don't feel this way often, but I do get surges of anger with what they have done, how they brought this crap into our lives that we never asked for or deserved. I hope you are healing. Hugs.