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Newest Member: Saad (61538)

User Topic: 8 mths out and still angry?
♀ 40317
Member # 40317
Default  Posted: 5:55 PM, August 17th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi all,

I'm wondering what types of self-help books you all read that helped you get past the anger and start living for yourselves again?

I've read a few post-affair books (How to Help your Spouse Heal from Your Affair, and another one, I can't remember it's title), they both helped me and spouse at the time. I'm not looking for those, persay. I'm looking for a book that can help me work through the anger, resentment, lonely feeling I still have?

My head understands why I need to process these feelings, and I also understand the reasons behind the marital problems that we had prior to affair. I think one of those was my feeling like I wasn't being 100% engrossed in life. Just going through the motions and thinking this is it? Sort of a mid-life crisis too early in life. How do I snap out of that feeling? I'm scared to death to go backwards, and my relationship with WS IS better than it was; and I know we are in full reconciliation...I'm just lost? And scattered, which this post is a clear indicator of.

Me: BS
Him: WS
Married: 19 years
2 children
2 DDays

Posts: 510 | Registered: Aug 2013
♀ 12041
Member # 12041
Default  Posted: 6:48 PM, August 17th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I haven't read it, but I have seen "How Can I Forgive You" mentioned here quite a bit. It may be one to take a look at

Go softly my sweet friend. You will always be a part of who I am.

Posts: 52155 | Registered: Sep 2006
♀ 35873
Member # 35873
Default  Posted: 11:16 PM, August 17th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I like and am still reading First Aid for the Betrayed
I have laughed out loud and cried reading this book. I also like Not Just Friends but the anger part is more covered in First Aid and you can read the first 20 pages on Amazon to see if ya like!

together 21 years
1st D-Day 4-19-10
2nd D-Day 5-3-12
married 19 years
2 kids 13-twins

Posts: 123 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: Florida
♀ 35985
Member # 35985
Default  Posted: 11:25 AM, August 18th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I also liked "How Can I Forgive You."

I also found "The Dance of Anger" very informative. Author is Harriet Lerner.

Me: Finding my Sunlight
Him: Traitor in my Foxhole
Let go or get dragged.

Posts: 1255 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: a state of consciousness
Topic Posts: 4

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