just haven't *done* anything about because of fear.
I debated posting this only because I've posted about it a few times.
But basically, I am well aware that what I consider a close friendship is not the friendship I currently have. Its either I step away completely from a 24 year friendship, or I just back off a bit and overcome my fear of being completely alone, without a close friend.
This is the first weekend we aren't hanging out in like 3 years. We usually do every other weekend because our kids are the same ages and they are very close too. Well, this time I decided I am not going to make plans and neither did she, but she also said she assumed my kids weren't here this weekend.
Anyhow, my kids have been a bit upset at this break in the routine, but I actually feel it was needed and I think my friend does too.
So, where this will head, I'm unsure of, but I need to conquer this fear and stop sacrificing my own feelings, needs, wants to maintain a relationship in which I'm not truly happy with. There are many plusses, but there are also some negatives that's becoming increasingly hard to ignore. And I won't get into them all here, but I'm guessing some of you who have been in this stitch get the idea.
Its a weird spot to be in and I don't really know how I'm going to feel or what I'm going to do, if anything.
Thanks for listening to my late night ramblings.
Two boys: 20 and 17
Laughter will cure life's ills. Have you had your laugh today?