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fraeuken (original poster member #30742) posted at 11:07 PM on Monday, August 19th, 2013
The final paperwork came today and all I could think was "great, finally I can get him off my insurance". No feelings other than that. I am waiting for that sad moment and it has not happened yet. I have a feeling I might be celebrating tonight.
Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.
Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 11:18 PM on Monday, August 19th, 2013
So it's all signed & official? You're divorced?
Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU
nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 11:21 PM on Monday, August 19th, 2013
Congratulations, fraeuken. And welcome to the other side. It's much sunnier over here. 
You can call me NIK
And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane
fraeuken (original poster member #30742) posted at 11:22 PM on Monday, August 19th, 2013
Yes. Deal has been sealed. I am free as a bird.
Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.
Phoenix1 ( member #38928) posted at 11:28 PM on Monday, August 19th, 2013
Congrats! Enjoy the freedom and have a toast for all of us who are still trying to get to that point!
fBS - Me
Xhole - Multiple LTAs/2 OCs over 20+yrs
Adult Kids
Happily divorced!
You can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending. ~C.S. Lewis~
Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 11:38 PM on Monday, August 19th, 2013
Well then YAHOO!!!!!!!!!!! 
Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU
foxglove ( member #21791) posted at 1:47 AM on Tuesday, August 20th, 2013
Congrats! This is a big milestone and one I found brought feelings of relief.
Do something really nice for yourself tonight.
Me (BS) 57
XH (WS)
Married 21 years
Divorced 2/19/07
Two grown sons
Remarried 9/18
devistatedmom ( member #24961) posted at 1:51 AM on Tuesday, August 20th, 2013
BS(me) 46, Two wonderful teens.
He is no longer my best friend. Repeat until it sticks.
WH says marriage is over: May 15, 2009.
EA#2 July 20, 2009. Legally sep: Aug 16, 2009. DIVORCED!!!! Signed Nov 23, final Dec 24, 2010, adultery listed.
FaithFool ( member #20150) posted at 2:01 AM on Tuesday, August 20th, 2013
Yee haw! Congratulations.
DDay: June 15, 2008
Mistakenly married Mr. Superfreak
20 years of OWs, WTF?
Divorced Dec 26, 2011
"Life is a shipwreck, but we must not forget
to sing in the lifeboats". -- Voltaire
Williesmom ( member #22870) posted at 2:03 AM on Tuesday, August 20th, 2013
You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright
Chrysalis123 ( member #27148) posted at 2:08 AM on Tuesday, August 20th, 2013
Someone I once loved gave me/ a box full of darkness/ It took me years to understand/ That this, too, was a gift. - Mary Oliver
Just for the record darling, not all positive changes feel positive in the beginning -S C Lourie
ninebark ( member #24534) posted at 1:27 PM on Tuesday, August 20th, 2013
fraeuken WOOT!
I can't wait to join you, just one week and 30 days to go..lol.
Go and celebrate your new life
BS (me) 40
WH - 48
Married 12 years
DS - 12
D-day 06/21/09
Separated....hopefully divorcing soon.
sparkysable ( member #3703) posted at 3:21 PM on Tuesday, August 20th, 2013
As soon as I got mine, I went right to the social security office and the DMV and changed my name.
Then I came home, and it hit me, and I felt like I had been run over by a truck.
D-day OW#1 2/2004;D-day OW#2 5/2010
Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.
brokenandconfuse ( member #39381) posted at 4:36 PM on Tuesday, August 20th, 2013
2DS, 2DD
BS-Me 32
WH-Him 43
DDay-All 14 years of our relationship. 3PA's, 3 one night stands, and 6 EA's and still counting as we go. Gained enough strength to face it 11/2012
Getting Divorced
whatdoto ( member #28555) posted at 5:12 PM on Tuesday, August 20th, 2013
Congratulations!
I should be a free bird in about 2 weeks. And a new homeowner to boot!
Cheers to you!
"If your ideal image of yourself is in the future, it's going to stay there".
dmari ( member #37215) posted at 5:14 PM on Tuesday, August 20th, 2013
Congratulations!! I am so jealous!! Continue moving forward and thriving!!
fraeuken (original poster member #30742) posted at 5:24 PM on Tuesday, August 20th, 2013
Still no emotional reaction other than wanting to get all the next steps completed, such as opening my own insurance account, removing him from health insurance etc.
I think he has pissed me off to no end at this point that I can't be sad over this, just relieved:
- Asked me via text if I was broke (no, my dear) because I took 200$ out of the joint account which had been transferred accidentally. Just wanted my hard earned money back to go see a nice show with my German friend in Las Vegas on Sunday night. And yes, we did see ‘Thunder from Down Under’
- Still owes our joint account over $1000 but keeps telling me that I owe him (I guess, he is the one who is broke). Bookkeeping is just not his strength which is scary after 20+ years in the banking industry. Even with giving him credit for paid car insurance and HOA fees for our rental properties, he still owes ME.
- When informed that he owes me and has not addressed the issue since June, I received the following text: ‘and btw, I pay 52$ per month for DD16’s cellphone’…. Well, never mind I just gave her a brand new laptop for her birthday, pay for all her sports activities, her MRI and xRays, physical therapy etc…. and never say a word to him about it.
- Guess who showed up at my house yesterday while I was a work? The puppy was back, spent 6 hours at my house because XH’s girlfriend was not available to watch him and knowing that I was not home he just thought it was a good idea to dump the dog with DD11 at my place. Never said a word to me. Let me say, the money I spent yesterday morning on my cleaning lady was rather wasted…
- Changed all agreements on short notice. He was supposed to have DDs today through Thursday as per agreement and I had planned my work schedule around that. Last night he tells me, only after I ask when he plans to pick up, that he is not taking them because it was inconvenient. He actually tried to blame it on DD16 who was upset he tried to do that. I raised hell, he will pick them up after all.
I could go on and on and on….Also, he is having DD16 take her driving lessons so that she can drive herself and DD11 40 miles from where he is moving to in order to get to school in the morning. She would have to cross the Golden Gate bridge in heavy traffic mornings and evenings. I am livid and have started talking to my attorney to see if XH can enforce this. I really don’t want DD16 to have responsibility for driving DD11 being a new driver. This is not your easy quick 2 mile morning commute…. See, no room for sadness really, just anger and astonishment at his lack of common sense.
[This message edited by fraeuken at 11:26 AM, August 20th (Tuesday)]
Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.
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