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Must Survive (original poster member #34533) posted at 2:33 AM on Tuesday, August 20th, 2013
I read a lot of recommendations for books to read. I have read several. I wasted so much time reading books on how to work on marriage, how to deal with infidelity etc.
I can say I feel empowered by the book recommended on here so often: The Journey from Abandonment to Healing, by Susan Anderson.
In the past couple of weeks I have been reading this, learning about so much of what I was dealing with. And it is helping "me", its not about STBXH and his issues etc.
I have gained more clarity in my emotions, reactions and my personal gotchas with this book. I truly wished it was one of the first books I read when this all happened.
I am not anywhere near recovered, but by golly, I do have hope!
Me BS
WS: Just a squished bug on the window of my life!
Divorced-Let my new beginning start
They have a choice: they can live in my new world, or they can die in their old one." — Daenerys Targaryen
SBB ( member #35229) posted at 12:47 PM on Tuesday, August 20th, 2013
I have had to keep putting it down because it stirred up so much in me (in a good but scary way).
I've been mulling over the first chapters for several months now and I have felt a seismic shift within me. It feels good and quite a lot less scary.
I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!
imwideawake ( member #23386) posted at 1:17 PM on Tuesday, August 20th, 2013
That book helped me so much that I traveled a fewl hundred miles to attend a weekend work shop by the author. She was a therapist and going through similar issues realized her methods didn't touch the pain. She dug deep and came up with this notion that abandonment is a human condition. We all fear it. The fear drives us to do some crazy stuff. Great book!
Together 21 years.
Married 19
Me: BW
Him XWH
dday 9/08
3 daughters, now grown
Divorced 12/04/12
hangingontohope7 ( member #20024) posted at 2:26 PM on Tuesday, August 20th, 2013
I just started this book over the weekend. I can't put it down. I've been utilizing the techniques to "stay in the moment." They are extremely helpful when I wake up in the middle of the night, filled with anxiety and I can't go back to sleep.
I'm so glad that I saw the recommendation for this book here on the site. And, that others seem to have such a positive experience by reading it.
Me: BW
DDay #1 Tried R
DDAY #2 Divorcing
Burn everything love then burn the ashes.
katiesmom ( member #39074) posted at 3:09 PM on Tuesday, August 20th, 2013
After hearing so many positive reviews about this book, I got a copy last week and have started reading it.
From what I have read so far, I think it's going to be a huge help.
solus sto ( member #30989) posted at 3:22 PM on Tuesday, August 20th, 2013
This book helped me more than anything else...it's the one I recommend to everyone.
BS-me, 62; X-irrelevant; we’re D & NC. "So much for the past and present. The future is called 'perhaps,' which is the only possible thing to call the future. And the important thing is not to let that scare you." Tennessee Williams
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