floridaredman - I will attempt to answer your questions in the hopes that I can shine some light on my situation. If only to help better me in my situation. That is after all the only reason I have come here to this forum. Than I will address another underling issue, that should not be ignored.
What have you been doing so far?
First and foremost, sat down in the first week after DDAY and wrote time lines down for my BS. I tried to be as thorough as I could and answered any remaining questions my BS. has had, even if it is the same question being asked. I got us an appointment for MC right away. I have given up any outside social activities and even social media to focus solely on helping my BS.Every day post DDAY has been spent working on my marriage and very little else. I know that this is the most important thing for me to do right now.
Are you being patient?
I will say that at times, I have not been patient, but I am trying an learning.
Are you adhering to his love language? (does he like affirmation, physical touch, gifts, acts of service, conversation etc.)
I have absolutely been adhering to his love language.
This has been the easiest part for me. I put notes in his lunch, send him numerous text throughout the day to tell him how much I love him. I tell him that I am still very attracted to him because I am! I also let him know that he is a great father and husband! We have been liniment almost every day since DDAY. I am definitely more affectionate now then I ever was before DDAY.
Are you being empathetic?
I will be very honest by saying that I have not been as empathetic as I should. NOT because I don't care. This has been my coping mechanism for a long time. I bury pain so deep in order to not feel it. If you reread my first post, you will see some of the heartbreak that I have experienced in my life. What I posted was only a fraction of what I have had to deal with in my life. I did not write about all of it because I am here to focus on saving my marriage and not disusing my whole life story. I will save that for my shrink.
Do you make him feel safe when you are not with him?
Absolutely! He knows where I am every second the day, even if it is a quick trip to put gas in my car. I forgot on two accessions early on and saw how much it bothered him and I will not do that again. he also has a GPS on my phone. I am totally transparent to him.
Now to address the other issue.
I am wonder why you made this comment.
If a post gets you worked up you should investigate why, even if the post is wrong
. Please let me know what exactly you mean by this. I do not recall saying anything about anyone's post that made me feel "attacked." Those were your words, not mine. That is all the time I want to spend on this topic right now.