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User Topic: Do you ever just get a "feeling" ?
♀ 38116
Member # 38116
Default  Posted: 6:07 PM, August 21st (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Today I have felt "off".
I cannot place my finger on it.
Sure WH was a few minutes late from work but nothing to raise an eyebrow...
But, when I expressed concern to whereas he usually laughs it off - he got defensive.
After a few minutes of unwind time - he apologized - said he's super stressed at work - which is true.
But - I can't shake a gut feeling...
I don't even trust my gut anymore BUT something is off for sure.

BS - 32
DDay 1: July 2012 - EA with COW
DDay 2: March 2015; same COW

Fool me once, shame on you.
Fool me twice, pack your shit and get out.

Fool me twice, now what?!?!

Posts: 397 | Registered: Jan 2013
♀ 39201
Member # 39201
Default  Posted: 6:34 PM, August 21st (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Trust your gut, it is preparing you.

Me: BS 47
Him:WH 55
M: 27 yrs
DD 4/29/13
3 kids (25,23,22

Posts: 82 | Registered: May 2013
♀ 39197
Member # 39197
Default  Posted: 6:34 PM, August 21st (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes, and so far it hasn't been wrong. Trust your gut and go into stealth digging mode if you need to.

Story in my profile
He lied, I gave the gift of R
He became the model remorseful WS...all while lying and seeing her
Am I done? Yes I am!

Posts: 347 | Registered: May 2013
♀ 40095
Member # 40095
Default  Posted: 6:36 PM, August 21st (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yep. And every time my feeling has been spot on. Trust your intuition.

BS: Me
WH: Husband
One daughter - 22 months
Married 11.5 years
2.5 false R's.
Status: Divorcing.
You can't pick up a turd by the clean end. Time to flush the toilet.

Posts: 253 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Somewhere on the Eastern Seaboard
♀ 36576
Member # 36576
Default  Posted: 6:38 PM, August 21st (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes. I'm where you are now, just a feeling that something is off. I haven't trusted my gut until recently, but I've had this feeling for a long time. And now that I am I think I'm finally starting to uncover some things.

Trust it. Stay calm. Start digging.

[This message edited by whatnow8 at 6:38 PM, August 21st (Wednesday)]

wtf?? How insane does your life have to get that you want to polygraph your freaking HUSBAND. ~ OldCow18

It's hard to make a decision when you're too tired to hold on and too in love to let go. ~ unknown

Posts: 178 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: midwest
♀ 21101
Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 6:55 PM, August 21st (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Those gut feelings are usually right. Occasionally it ends in. Surprise that it's something else or even one time a surprise for me! But everything it's been right

Him: FWS
Kids: 18 & 20
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

Posts: 13440 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
♀ 32554
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 7:06 PM, August 21st (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

EVERY feeling I ever had meant something was going on or I was about to discover something. Even now that we're separated and almost divorced, I still get feelings and BAM! Something comes up.

Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!

Posts: 10722 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
♀ 40076
Member # 40076
Default  Posted: 9:40 PM, August 21st (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

How many minutes is a few?

Ever since I found out my husband was cheating on me I've felt "off." I'm not saying it's nothing, I'm just saying it's normal to not feel quite right these days. I would keep an eye out, but my suggestion is not to obsess over one "off" moment, but that's JMO.

*Edited because I'm crazy tired and can't see straight.

[This message edited by krazy8516 at 9:41 PM, August 21st (Wednesday)]

me: BW, 30
him: WH, 25
us: edging closer to R every day

married 2y, together 2.5y
1 beautiful daughter, 23m

"Someday soon, I'm going to put my life together; Win or lose, I'm starting over again."

Posts: 368 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Texas
♀ 34823
Member # 34823
Default  Posted: 10:01 PM, August 21st (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

3P....the one absolute thing that I've learned from this shitstorm is to ALWAYS trust you gut.

There isn't always fire where you see smoke, but......

"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.

Posts: 9188 | Registered: Feb 2012 | From: Midwest
♂ 39183
Member # 39183
Default  Posted: 10:07 PM, August 21st (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am going to agree with gonnabe here. The problem with this situation (in my personal experience) is that we suffer an utter blindside betrayal. This makes us emotionally suspicious of everything and always trying not to allow ourselves to relax, so that we are not caught out again.

I get a hundred of these 'not quite right' feelings every day, and thats an improvement on last month. 90% are nothing, but I remember the 10% that are linked to a new fact or realisation, and so this feeling becomes a warning, even if it is 90% wrong.

This feeling does not tell you that something is wrong. It just tells you that you are uneasy. Dont ignore it, as you may have picked up on something that you should know, but dont convict anyone based on a gut feeling.

These days, a gut feeling tells me that I need to look deeper, and either I find something and I was right, or I dont and I feel better. Either way, look out for yourself.

[This message edited by Ixion at 10:43 PM, August 22nd (Thursday)]

Posts: 24 | Registered: May 2013
♀ 40050
Member # 40050
Default  Posted: 8:26 AM, August 22nd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I agree. Sometimes my "gut" is really my PTSD kicking back in from all the trauma of the lies and betrayals.

Me BW, Him WH (sosorry54)
DD 4/12/13
TT until 9/18/14

Posts: 167 | Registered: Jul 2013
Topic Posts: 11

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