SurvivingInfidelity.com Forum Archives

sri624 posted 8/22/2013 11:48 AM

my h came to me this morning to tell me that he had a LinkedIn invite from the ow..and showed me the invite in his email. We have been nc for almost a year. Remember this is the same woman who tried to "be friends" with me a few months after dday. and sent him anonymous letter at his job after she told me she would not contact him again. we both did nc.

now this morning, the invite to my husband from her in LinkedIn.

what do you think? he said that he will just ignore it. Or do you think he should go into LinkedIn and decline her invite...if you can do that...or just ignore altogether.

I am thinking ignore period...but i wanted to see what you guys thought.

Mack9512 posted 8/22/2013 11:55 AM

Definitely fishing. I hate LinkedIn because of how easy it is to stalk a person on it.

Only crickets. She means nothing so she gets nothing.

Mack

OldCow18 posted 8/22/2013 11:57 AM

She has balls, huh? Good for your H to tell you right away. I see the options there are to accept, ignore, or report as spam. While I'd be very tempted to report her as spam, ignoring is probably best. Then have him delete the invite from his message box.

Audrina posted 8/22/2013 11:59 AM

Don't you just love it when the desperate OW s come out fishing?
No class whatsoever.

Yes, I consider this as fishing.

Ignore or decline the invitation? Hmmm
My first instinct tells me to decline that way you don't have to see her picture in your inbox.

Sorry, she is still trying to connect with you and your H. It must be damn annoying.

Lovedyoumore posted 8/22/2013 12:00 PM

MC said to be prepared for OW to come back around. He compared it to a vampire (not venting, that is what he said) coming back to their previous victims looking for the familiar and anything they can get to feed a need.

I think she is fishing, hoping for a bite. No pun intended.

sri624 posted 8/22/2013 13:27 PM

okay...guys...i think just going crickets is best. no acknowledgement at all. part of me wanted him to decline...and have that send a message.

but i think it would open the door. she would be like..."oh, he declined...i wonder why...let me contact him again."

if there was no response at all...she would just drive herself crazy wondering why he didnt respond. that is better.

same with me...when she sent me an email a while back, i just ignored her. i am sure she spent the whole day wondering why i didnt respond.

thanks guys.

JanaGreen posted 8/22/2013 13:29 PM

Ignore her. It'll drive her nuts.

I'm currently sitting on a LinkedIn invitation from my husband's ex - while she's not exactly an OW, they did talk and text some last year when we were quasi-separated. Nothing happened but still - ick. She has no reason to request me other than nosiness/trying to get an "in."

Tearsoflove posted 8/22/2013 13:34 PM

I have gotten some odd invites on linked in from people I know only in passing. I am assuming that linked in, like facebook and pretty much every other app allows the sending of a blanket invite that goes out to all contacts in an email address book. Giving her the benefit of the doubt, if you haven't heard from her in forever it's always possible she used an old email address to sign up and it did the blanket invite thing. Or that she recently connected a mobile phone.

I know my husband connected a mobile phone to the internet and didn't know what he was doing. He sent a facebook invite to every single person in his phone contacts (including the auto parts store), completely by accident. He now has more facebook friends than he ever wanted...LOL. And he still doesn't know how he did it.

EvenKeel posted 8/22/2013 13:39 PM

Just so you are prepared....LinkedIn will continue to send you "reminders" for a little while. I have two requests now that I am ignoring and about once a week I get a courtesy notice of "Michael is still waiting to connect with you".

fourever posted 8/22/2013 22:24 PM

Have him delete it so no reminders come. Wow! God help the OW if she ever dares come our way again….

HardenMyHeart posted 8/23/2013 00:58 AM

Fishing is a good sign that NC has been maintained. Ignore her.

sri624 posted 8/23/2013 01:43 AM

thanks everyone for your advice and support. i did unfortunately let her have the power by allowing her to ruin my day. i am going to work on that.

no contact is definitely the right way to go.