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pappabear posted 8/26/2013 22:20 PM

Good mooring everybody,

For the longest time I was a I a a Wh :( Is this where I can post....sorry a little confused but I think I have a lot to bring to the table....expecially for all BS

homewrecked2011 posted 8/26/2013 22:23 PM

I'm not sure, but I'd love to hear what you have to say,

Maybe a moderator will let you know soon.

Deeply Scared posted 8/26/2013 22:32 PM


A moderator sent you the Madhatter rules so please pick the forum and 'hat' you're wearing to post under

MystiKay posted 8/26/2013 22:45 PM

Just curious. Sense you are a mad hatter have you gone back and read your posts form when you were a BS? And compaired what you felt then to what you feel now?

pappabear posted 8/27/2013 22:21 PM

Yes I have; I am ending the A tonight. Believe it or not this relationship I had even though it was short finally gave me closure. I no longer think about her A and become upset because I understand. It makes you feel young again; it was nothing she did wrong; it was purley selfish. Please do not get me wrong I am not saying that having an A yourself is the cure, it just happened. When I do tell my wife it will be in full detail and I will beg for her forgiveness. I will not keep it from her.

gonnabe2016 posted 8/27/2013 22:24 PM

So it gave you *closure*? What, because now you're *even*?
Are you kidding me???

hardtimesinlife posted 8/27/2013 23:08 PM

I'm disturbed by this post, pappabear. You don't even feel remorse? You had a "relationship" while married and feel ok about that? I think what you did was have an RA. And, the point of an RA is precisely to tell your wife all the details. I think you should dig deeper. Do you like yourself now? Would you be proud if your kids knew? Would you understand if your wife did it again, and felt younger?

stilllovinghim posted 8/27/2013 23:43 PM

Papa, I responded to your post in Wayward but this:

it was nothing she did wrong; it was purley selfish.

Wait....what??!! I can't she was innocent but selfish? Are we talking about the same person? An adult, right? Not a two year old. Did you accidently mean for that sentence to go towards a text regarding a child in another forum or personal text to someone you know? I mean....for the love of....*smh*

Eta: I'm guessing you're saying that because you feel it applies to you as well.

[This message edited by stilllovinghim at 11:44 PM, August 27th (Tuesday)]

pappabear posted 8/28/2013 11:06 AM

No I do not feel closure because I feel *even*...I just's hard to resist. Few more minutes my W will be home and I will tell her. This sucks!!! I know now how she felt when she told me...but I will not leave out anything...get it right the first time. I hope she beleives me that there was no sex...there is no reason for me to lie here.

SisterMilkshake posted 8/28/2013 11:10 AM

I am not saying that having an A yourself is the cure, it just happened
No it didn't! You fed it. You chose it. You made it happen. It was a decision.

PrincessPeach06 posted 8/28/2013 11:14 AM

I am sorry but I wouldn't even want to put my worst enemy through the hell I'be been through...let alone my WS. If I want to feel "young" I will go hang out in a nursing home.

struggling3 posted 8/28/2013 11:18 AM

If I want to feel "young" I will go hang out in a nursing home.

This made me the middle of a post that was mostly making me sick.

Jennifer99 posted 8/28/2013 12:04 PM

I'm always trying to be more understanding of individuals and not lump people into generalizations and be more forgiving.

May I ask a question as a BS?

Do you think "it's hard to resist" was true for you now because you knew about her A? Do you think this A for you would have happened without that knowledge?

pappabear posted 8/28/2013 12:38 PM

Yes I do :( I didn't come to that conclusion until after

nowiknow23 posted 8/28/2013 12:49 PM

----posting as a member----

it just happened
Huge cop out. It didn't just happen. You made choices that landed you where you are. Until you can own those choices and stop looking at this as something that just occurred, you really WON'T get it. At all.

ETA: Also, please consider updating your tagline to reflect your madhatter status. I know many folks rely on the tagline to understand the poster's situation and perspective when responding to threads.

[This message edited by nowiknow23 at 2:00 PM, August 28th (Wednesday)]

Jennifer99 posted 8/28/2013 12:49 PM

May I ask another question?

Did you ever contemplate and RA or fantasize about an RA?

pappabear posted 8/28/2013 14:00 PM

Yes I did coniplate a RA...never did it but I did think about it...and yes it just happened believe it or not...her husband has ignored her for two years...she was in tears and I got scared and held her...she looked up and kissed me...we kissed for at least 5 felt amazing....I am not ashamed of saying that....but I am done....and I am ashamed of what I did....but still care about the AP....

Jennifer99 posted 8/28/2013 14:18 PM

Had you known each other a long time?

Aubrie posted 8/28/2013 14:21 PM

her husband has ignored her for two years
How do you know? Do you live with them? Or is that what she told you? You do know that cheaters are also liars right?

So she was scared and you kissed her. Why did you kiss her? Do you kiss all scared women you meet?

Deeply Scared posted 8/28/2013 14:26 PM

How do you know? Do you live with them?

Sorry...that was a good one

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