"You can survive this. Talk to others that have"

BrokenDaisy posted 8/27/2013 07:35 AM

Almost a year later than my first lawyer promised it would be done but the court date is finally set. We have a settlement agreement and everything went amicably so far so it should be straightforward. By mid October I will be legally and officially free of him.

Only snag? It's 2 days before our would-be wedding anniversary! It shouldn't bother me but it is. It's just going to make something emotional more emotional. It is still jarring that it is the same man that I grew up with and spent so many years forming memories with that absolutely crushed me. All fake memories now but doesn't change how I felt about him in those years. If only he was who I believed him to be! Don't take me wrong I am so fucking happy this is almost over and I am so over stbx and his drama. Since in-house separation ended I have really felt lighter without him around. I have many obstacles I'm working on but one of them is not missing him. I so do not miss him or want R anymore. However he still was a part of my whole life and I will sit in that court room remembering that only a few years ago on that same day I thought I was marrying the love of my life soon and that so much good was coming for us.... Oh how wrong I was!!! Life changes so very quickly.

I suppose it is normal to be emotional too? Even though I am so done with stbx! It's more about the fact that it wasn't suppose to end like this. I wasn't suppose to have my heart ripped out before the ink could barely dry on our marriage contract.

On the other side I feel only relief. So close, almost done with this shit!

jo2love posted 8/27/2013 11:52 AM

(((Broken)))

I'm sorry you are going through this. I hope your NB is filled with happiness.

devistatedmom posted 8/27/2013 19:12 PM

Hold tight BrokenDaisy. You are going to get there. One day at a time.

nowiknow23 posted 8/27/2013 19:21 PM

I suppose it is normal to be emotional too?

Completely normal! The mix of relief, grief, sadness, and even happiness is totally par for the course.

Allow yourself to feel everything that comes your way. ((((brokendaisy))))

dmari posted 8/27/2013 19:48 PM

It IS such weird feeling to be emotional over someone that you never want to be with again, isn't it? It is completely normal. Just continue to move forward even with all the emotions ~ it just shows what a loving, committed, compassionate, sensitive, and faithful person you are.