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Do you tell IC everything

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strawblond30 posted 8/28/2013 17:36 PM

Ok here is my deal I haven't told my IC about us becoming swingers , my stupid idea so he wouldn't cheat . I hated it refused most of the time and felt traded for sex and in all honestly I was. Since I wasn't into it 100% cus I didn't like it and always only wanted him. Should I tell IC or it don't matter!!

gonnabe2016 posted 8/28/2013 17:42 PM


nowiknow23 posted 8/28/2013 17:49 PM

I do tell everything. If I am not honest with myself and my IC, my time and hers are wasted.

Abbondad posted 8/28/2013 17:54 PM

My story is similar to yours. When we were together we told our MC everything. After STBXWW ceased therapy, I have continued in IC with the same therapist and tell her absolutely everything. That is what a good therapist is there for: don't hold back. Let it all out. It is cathartic.

All the best.

Ashland13 posted 8/28/2013 17:55 PM

I tell everything.

That's why I'm going and paying all that money and I don't feel authentic otherwise...feels wasted, instead.

If you are judged or don't like the reply, you could always get another one.

Sometimes nothing we try to do is going to keep someone from cheating-it's not on us to try to keep it altogether, but on each one of us, responsibility, that is.

I'm sorry you were compromised and hope you won't anymore. Stick to what you believe in and be true to yourself!

Nature_Girl posted 8/28/2013 18:41 PM

Yes. You tell everything. Every embarrassing, shameful thing.

Must Survive posted 8/28/2013 20:15 PM

Everything. You are trying to heal yourself, but your not being authentic to the one person who can guide you towards healing.

PurpleRose posted 8/28/2013 20:51 PM

Absolutely tell. My IC is seriously the only reason I made it through the separation, the false R, and the final split. Seriously.

If you can't be honest with your IC maybe you need to find a different one?

Phoenix9572 posted 8/28/2013 21:23 PM

Yes! That's the only way they are going to be able to help you put all the puzzle pieces back together and help you be whole and strong again. Plus, you can almost bet that they have heard it all and more before you sat down in their office.

Gr8Lady posted 8/28/2013 21:45 PM

Open your heart, the truth will set you free.

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