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A Happy Story - 30 Years!

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Lalagirl posted 8/29/2013 11:29 AM

Since I doubt I will be on SI on Labor Day…just wanted to share some happy news.

This Monday, September 2 – FWH and I will celebrate our 30th wedding anniversary! We’re taking an extended weekend(a.k.a. “staycation”) and spending time with each other – visiting some local attractions, riding our bikes, taking in a movie & dinner, just doing fun, non-expensive things – and taking some time to spend with the kids and grandkids.

Many wondered why we weren’t going to Hawaii or something like that for such a milestone anniversary. Well, for one, we cannot afford it, and two, it’s just not our cup of tea. We prefer the presence of our own company, and the company of our grown daughters and our beautiful grandchildren. This is the life we always wanted – even back in 1983 when we married. I was 18, he was 20 – but we both wanted the same thing – a family. The conception of my children was no accident or surprise…they were planned and if I had to do it all over again, I would in a New York minute.

Obviously since I am a member of this club, these 30 years haven’t always been easy. FWH’s infidelity began and ended in his 40s (a three-year issue out of 30 years…but it still hurt terribly, especially given our history together) – 20-some years into our marriage – something that completely blindsided me and gave me quite the case of PTSD.

We are fully reconciled, but know that R is a forever process for which we must be grateful every day. Five years ago, at the beginning of R, we renewed our vows on our 25th anniversary. We plan to do the same for our 30th – just a private renewal between he and I. No need for fanfare. We have learned over the years that we’re pretty simple people and he learned that he doesn’t have to impress people to be loved and accepted. Our marriage has definitely been a journey of growing up together and of learning – and some of those “lessons” almost cost us our marriage.

I am one of the lucky ones –as is FWH. My FWH “got it” – went to IC/MC faithfully, did a complete turnaround and I got my husband back – but a better one, because there were some FOO issues (from both sides of our families) for which we both needed guidance so he and I could bond through these instead of letting them tear us apart.

So raise your glasses (with whatever your choice of beverage) – and toast with us!

Lala & Mr. Lala

Rebreather posted 8/29/2013 11:40 AM

Cheers! *clink clink*

Congratulations on a job well done. And the continuation of your journey together.

Silentthoughts posted 8/29/2013 11:43 AM

I'm so happy to hear that there is light at the end of the tunnel! Congrats and have a great anniversary!

heartache101 posted 8/29/2013 12:21 PM

Congrats Lala and Mr. Lala!!

30 years is a milestone!!

Have fun enjoy your time together!

LosferWords posted 8/29/2013 12:51 PM

Cheers to you, and thank you for this message of love and hope! Congrats!

devasted30 posted 8/29/2013 13:06 PM

So nice to hear a good story with a happy ending.
Congrats and enjoy your anniversary.

ajsmom posted 8/29/2013 13:15 PM

Congratulations!

AJ's MOM

lordhasaplan? posted 8/29/2013 13:17 PM

WONDERFUL!
So happy for the both of you.

OnAnIsland posted 8/29/2013 13:28 PM

Tanti auguri! Congratulations to you both. Thank you for sharing this.

Alex CR posted 8/29/2013 13:48 PM

This is wonderful! Congratulations! It's so good to hear there can be happy outcomes in long term marriages that survive something as horrible as infidelity.

Best wishes to you both!

Alex CR posted 8/29/2013 13:48 PM

This is wonderful! Congratulations! It's so good to hear there can be happy outcomes in long term marriages that survive something as horrible as infidelity.

Best wishes to you both!

Cheatedon23 posted 8/29/2013 14:08 PM

Congratulations Lalagirl. Your story gives me hope.

My H and I will also be celebrating our 30th wedding anniversary on September 3! We are going away just the two of us for a long weekend. We felt that since it has been less than a year since D day, we needed to spend some time alone. R has been going really well lately, and I can honestly say that I am excited about the trip.

Happy Anniversary!

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