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trebleclef (original poster member #33488) posted at 4:29 AM on Friday, August 30th, 2013
Well, divorce is a done deal - Hallelujah! ( XH emailed the other day to ask "what's this about the D being final? I have no info." HAHA! I suspect he hasnt paid his lawyer.)
Big BUT...... the property settlement is still not done; D was severed from the settlement due to XH's delay tactics. Mediation was a fail - the mediator terminated us due to his non-compliance. So now, New Attorney is ready to blow him out of the water with everything she can think of to Shock and Awe and Overwhelm and Intimidate - in order to then slip him a nice letter offering to forget all that if he would just sign the agreement we've had on the table for two years.
Will the strategy work? I'm not betting on it. At last count XH had nearly 400 pieces of unopened mail - he is pathologically avoidant of anything that causes him anxiety. I think he will ignore the pressing documents served and we will end up in court. All because he disagrees with an appraisal I had done, and refuses to get his own. SIGH.
Can't wait to get this over with. Here comes the atomic bomb - and I am steeling myself to be the bad guy. Spent time with IC today preparing for the worst, including possible slitting of wrists (his).
Sitting at the top of the rapids in my canoe and expecting a wild ride. Wish me luck.
True remorse isn't followed by a "but".
newlysingle ( member #38735) posted at 4:48 AM on Friday, August 30th, 2013
Congrats on the divorce! I'm sorry that you're still having to deal with the property deal end of it. Sending you strength and mojo that it goes well!
BW - Me (40)
XWH -The Gnat
"Engaged" to OW, but the wedding appears to be indefinitely postponed.
M for 8 years, together for 10
1 DD (8), 1 DS (3)
Dday 3/13
Happily Divorced 9/20/13
MyReturn2Me ( member #34352) posted at 5:37 AM on Friday, August 30th, 2013
Here's some duct tape. Strap yourself in!
GOOD LUCK!!!!!
Me: BS 51 and Freaking AWESOME!
Him: Who the fuck cares........
tryingagain74 ( member #33698) posted at 6:17 AM on Friday, August 30th, 2013
Sending you wild ride on the rapids to peaceful, gentle waters mojo!
FBS; now happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley
SBB ( member #35229) posted at 8:08 AM on Friday, August 30th, 2013
Woowhoo - one down, one to go!
I sure do hope you get costs for him dragging this out.
I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!
heartbroken_kk ( member #22722) posted at 8:22 AM on Friday, August 30th, 2013
FBW then 46, XWHNPDPAFTG the destroyer of my entire life. D-Day 1 '99, D-Day 2,3,4,5,6... '09-'11, D '15. I fell apart. I put myself back together. Forgiveness isn't required. I'm happy and healthy now, and MY new life is good.
Kajem ( member #36134) posted at 12:27 PM on Friday, August 30th, 2013
I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - UnknownRelationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.
lynnm1947 ( member #15300) posted at 7:39 PM on Friday, August 30th, 2013
My dear friend found it was a HUGE mistake to separate the D from the financial settlement. Ten years later, her XH still hadn't settled. But, good luck to you, my dear, and all the best in your new life! Yeeeee-haw!
[This message edited by lynnm1947 at 1:41 PM, August 30th (Friday)]
Age: 64..ummmmmmm, no...............65....no...oh, hell born in 1947. You figure it out!
"I could have missed the pain, but I would have had to miss the dance." Garth Brooks
hemademesingle ( member #21281) posted at 7:58 PM on Friday, August 30th, 2013
Congratulations on the divorce,
Your X sounds a lot like my dumbass STBX, we are 23 months into the court system, and he still hasn't provided his financials, hasn't filed income tax since 2007
I had 2 judges refuse to severe the divorce from the finances,
Sometimes it's a nightmare dealing with these idiots
trebleclef (original poster member #33488) posted at 5:32 AM on Sunday, September 1st, 2013
Thanks for the mojo SI peeps! I need all the encouragement I can get. It started today with my final email to him, letting him know that all bets are off and I am no longer putting $ into the account, ( as per advice from my lawyer) As you can imagine, that was not well received, but I told him any further response from him would be deleted unread, and to forward any other comments or questions to his lawyer.
hemademesingle - yep - they're clones. Mine hasnt filed income tax for several years either, nor provided the legal paperwork. I really needed the divorce to be final so that I could move on financially - no one will lend me anything while I'm tied to him. I'm glad that part is done; I am free now to pursue other relationships and make decisions without his input etc.
This new lawyer is a crackerjack, and unlike the last one who actually reminded me a lot of XH, WILL take him before a judge if he doesn't comply. How is it that these guys get away with stuff endlessly? 
True remorse isn't followed by a "but".
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