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Divorce/Separation :
Regrouping when you lose it

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 soveryweary (original poster member #32265) posted at 12:11 AM on Sunday, September 1st, 2013

I have been walking on eggshells during this in house separation.

Not engaging if I can help it and staying away as much as possible.

Every single time I have been out with friends or family, he texts something nasty.

Last night my daughter and I went with family to a ball game. I mentioned it to him when he called about a financial issue, and I could just hear it in hs tone, there was going to be hell to pay.

So halfway through the game I get a text, "you are a fucking piece of work."

Sick to my stomach, I left soon after. I wanted to get home before my daughter to see what rage problem was.

Apparently I am a Fing c$&@ like my cousins who are divorced. I also am sneaky, he doesn't trust ME. How dare I go out and not give him advanced notice??? After all we are still married.

I'm ashamed to say I lost it, crying and just yelling at him that he has some nerve!! And I called his AP every name in the book and some I made up.

Didn't sleep worth a darn, but that's not a new thing.

I know I need to get out. I have to stop using my daughters health as an excuse.

If I let him continue to do this, if I continue to allow him to beat me down, they will win.

I am going to draw on the strength of you dear, strong friends here on SI.

Divorced 1/3/14 after 31 years of marriage.

posts: 646   ·   registered: May. 25th, 2011
id 6470154
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Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 12:24 AM on Sunday, September 1st, 2013

((((HUGS))))

When is in-house going to be over?

Would you be able to get a VAR and record this the next time he goes off on you?

Okay, so you KNOW you're not a f-ing c**t. We all know this. That bastard is just running you down because you're daring to have a life.

What are you doing to take care of yourself?

Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU

posts: 10722   ·   registered: Jun. 21st, 2011   ·   location: USA
id 6470161
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Pass ( member #38122) posted at 2:19 AM on Sunday, September 1st, 2013

He's an arsehole. All he is looking to do is make your life miserable.

Divorced the cheater and living my best life now.

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous.

posts: 3785   ·   registered: Jan. 14th, 2013   ·   location: Ontario, Canada
id 6470237
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PurpleBirch ( member #39170) posted at 3:56 AM on Sunday, September 1st, 2013

((soveryweary))

I know a bit of what you're talking about. WH was furious with me last night because I had a (prearranged) coffee date with one of my best friends. He was mad that I could find the time to spend with her but not him (even though he'd been ok with it the night before). He got pretty nasty

I hope your night is going better.

Me: BS (32)
Him: WH (31)
Married 3 years.
Confessed to PA April 21 2013.

DS (6), DS (18 months)

Aug 30 2013 He gives me back his ring with an ultimatum: "Get over it or get out".

Status: Done like dinner

posts: 277   ·   registered: May. 4th, 2013   ·   location: The frozen North, eh?
id 6470323
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