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Newest Member: EmptyBS2015 (49865)

User Topic: Feeling terrible
♀ 35178
Member # 35178
Default  Posted: 4:14 PM, September 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm posting here instead of general as this is where I spend a lot of time and thought people might be able to relate more here since they have or are coming out of the other side.

I don't know what has come over me this weekend. I just feel terrible and hopeless. I am aware that I am probably depressed and have started medication (prozac). I am not sure if they have started kicking in yet, I have read that it may get worse on these before it gets better.

I went out on Friday night to a pub and then a house party which ended up turning into an all nighter with no sleep. I got home at around 11am and managed about 2 hours sleep but was pretty useless for the rest of the day. I went to bed early last night and didn't wake until about 11 this morning and I just feel so utterly depressed and hopeless. My mother's illness has a lot to do with this but also so does my ex which I hate to admit. I was doing ok with NC with him but this weekend has hit me hard and I just miss him, even though I know I shouldn't and that really I should be thankful I am rid of him. I'm just not. I can't see a way out of this and he has been on my mind a lot. I just wish he hadn't turned out the way he did. I am not sure how to deal with it. It just doesn't feel that I will ever be past this awful stage in my life. All I want to do right now is crawl into bed and sleep. I hate waking up to this every day. It doesn't feel like things will change, doesn't feel I will meet anyone else in the future, everything just seems hopeless and when anything does happen to my mother I will be alone and have no one.

I know all of us have been through complete hell here but I really see no way out and I am scared. Does anyone have any words of encouragement or hope?

Posts: 306 | Registered: Mar 2012
♀ 34697
Member # 34697
Default  Posted: 4:44 PM, September 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


I'm sorry that you are hurting. I hope the meds begin to give you relief soon. I don't suffer from depression, but find when I'm feeling down that accomplishing something...anything, helps me. I also like to practice mindfulness to get me out of my head and connected to the world outside of me. And once I'm out of my head I can see that things aren't quite as bad as I'm making them out to be.
((((hugs again))))

"Thou art the son and heir of a mongrel bitch." --King Lear

Posts: 4956 | Registered: Jan 2012
♀ 33226
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 6:03 PM, September 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hurtagain - I'm sorry you're in such a low spot right now. These days come and go for me, so I can absolutely relate to what you've written.

Give the ADs time to work. In the meantime, find ways to keep yourself occupied - both mentally and physically.

Also, I may be making an assumption about the pub and house party, but alcohol is NOT your friend when you are depressed. It is a depressant, and can only intensify those feelings. Take care of yourself. ((((Hugs))))

You can call me NIK

This is it. The darkest day. The blackest hour. Chin up, shoulders back. Let's see what we're made of, you and I.
- The Doctor

Posts: 32537 | Registered: Aug 2011
♀ 36307
Member # 36307
Default  Posted: 6:31 PM, September 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sometimes our emotional plate is just full, spilling over. That initiates a feeling of becoming overwhelmed.
My IC advised me to lower my expectations, prioritize commitments and rest. It is difficult to get restful sleep when one is so overwhelmed.
Personally, I like to watch movies (my choice) and relax. Today has been a Lifetime Movie Day for me.

BS: Me (65yo)FWH: HIM (67yo)) serial infidelities over past 35 years
DD: Multiple unconfirmed until 2013

friends wife lasting 10 years. TT over a
year a year. Now his health is declining,
among the lack of communication.

Posts: 665 | Registered: Jul 2012
♀ 33129
Member # 33129
Default  Posted: 8:32 PM, September 1st (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sometimes feeling the pain allows me to process it, then I can let it go.

Can you give yourself a "time limit" on this feeling of sadness? Say, ok I'll be sad and grieve the ex today. But tomorrow I will get up, get out of this funk and do something positive for myself.

Even if that is just taking a 15 minute walk through your neighborhood. Or going to get a cup of coffee, or baking a cake. Find some way to bring a small amount of joy into your world.

And hang in there. We are here, and we understand. I hope you find something to being you happiness tomorrow.

divorced the Dooosh 8/13
even if you find your voice,
sometimes it does not matter anymore,
when you speak to a man who is deaf by choice.

Posts: 3638 | Registered: Aug 2011 | From: Happyville
Topic Posts: 5

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