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Well that was a little weird

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MovingUpward posted 9/1/2013 19:42 PM

My XSIL, who is good friends with my sister and still touches base with me from time to time, had invited the kids and I over for a bbq. XW was there with her SO as well as many members of her family. It was ok and I enjoyed talking with some of those x-family members. But it was still weird. I guess this is pretty good to be able to do this for my kids at 5 years out from D.

[This message edited by MovingUpward at 7:42 PM, September 1st (Sunday)]

nowiknow23 posted 9/1/2013 20:00 PM

I think it speaks volumes that you were able to go and enjoy yourself, Moo. Did you know XW and her SO were going to be there?

MovingUpward posted 9/1/2013 20:01 PM

I knew that they could be there. They left within the 1st hour.

inconnu posted 9/1/2013 20:29 PM

I think it's great that you could do that. I'm not sure if I could, not that I ever expect to get an invitation like that. I suspect the only time I'll be in the same place with ex and wifetress, as well as my ex-in-laws, is when one of my kids gets married. Knowing my kids, they'd probably elope to keep that from happening, too.

[This message edited by inconnu at 8:29 PM, September 1st (Sunday)]

PurpleRose posted 9/1/2013 20:38 PM

Well kudos to you! Hiw did your kids react? It'll be a cold day in hell before that ever happens in my world.

My XSIL is a complete fake and a bitch and if I never see her again it will be too soon. And the Dooosh will never be welcome around my brothers, in fact that would be a very dangerous endeavor for him.

It is refreshing to hear of folks like you though. I'm glad you could reconnect with them. I'd rather jam a fork in my eye!

Chrysalis123 posted 9/1/2013 20:49 PM

I am 5 years out from D and could not do that. In my case In-laws were and still are rotten to me.

Bravo for Moo!

[This message edited by Chrysalis123 at 8:50 PM, September 1st (Sunday)]

woundedby2 posted 9/1/2013 21:37 PM

Good for you, Moo! I couldn't do it, that's for sure.

gma56 posted 9/1/2013 22:12 PM

You did good, Moo !
Yeah, guess I could do it for DSS or one of the GS. I would be thinking how thankful he wasn't my problem.

wildbananas posted 9/2/2013 00:54 AM

You did good, dude.

Jrazz posted 9/2/2013 01:19 AM


You handled it like a champ. I'm glad they didn't stay for long.


Kajem posted 9/2/2013 04:49 AM

Good for you. I hope you had a good time after they left.

Always nice reconnecting with old friends. I am assuming that you are still friends with XSIL.


stronger08 posted 9/2/2013 05:25 AM

Glad it went well Moo. My son is making his confirmation this year and it will be the first time XW and I will have to be in the same room as each other. She has a fiancé who was not the OM. So I don't have any grudge with him. But XW and I have not exactly been friendly over the years. And at times it has been downright nasty. But within the last 6 months or so she has been civil. So I'm praying that we can celebrate our sons day without incident.

cayc posted 9/2/2013 05:56 AM

You are a bigger person than me. i couldnt have done that.

I like how they left within the first hour though, heh

NaiveAgain posted 9/2/2013 06:31 AM

I think that is wonderful that you were able to go to the bbq and handle it so well.

I know it had to be somewhat awkward, and I think it is neat when the parents are able to socialize in the same settings without any major negativity so that is awesome that you were able to go.

You have really come a long way

cmego posted 9/2/2013 07:34 AM

That is good to hear. I am still trying to deal with seeing ex and his bf at a "family function".

My BIL/SIL (his brother and wife) live in MY neighborhood. They moved here after I did. We discussed it and knew we need to tread carefully. They had a picnic a few months ago, and I couldn't bring myself to go. I just can't show up alone while he has gone on to have a "great relationship" and is now openly gay. I feel like people are talking about me.

I can be around ex and hang out without pain, but I just can't hang out ex and his bf without pain. I'm assuming that all happens with time.

I have hope!

click4it posted 9/2/2013 14:12 PM

that's pretty darn good MU. way to go. I can't imagine it NOT being weird.

persevere posted 9/2/2013 14:50 PM

That's great Moo, and I'm glad they left within the first hour. I also enjoy connecting with that side of the family, but I certainly prefer to do it without XWH nowhere in sight. Lol.

dontknowwhyme posted 9/4/2013 10:02 AM

It gets easier the more you do it also. I felt it very strange at first but not too bad anymore. I used to be very close with the inlaws. They joke that they wish they had gotten me in the divorce.

I'm glad you were able to make that step. I'm sure the kids enjoy it.

Exit Wounds posted 9/4/2013 13:29 PM

Moo, that is good news! That means you are moving forward and healing just fine!

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