I am the pregnant BW and I'm new. My WH had an affair with a co-worker, he's actually her boss. He HAS to see her and maintain contact with her-which drives me crazy. WH's job found out about the A and he almost lost his job. She's had FOUR complaints on her and still has a job. ARG!!
Anyways, WH says he's sorry, wants the marriage to work, wants the family, is excited about the baby, etc.
At the same time, he still lies. He lies about her interaction with him. For instance-he had to take a new hire to lunch and the new hire works at OW's location so she went too. Instead of telling me about it, WH said it was just him and new hire. I found out OW was there, too. We are in MC and he even said he knew he needed to be honest, but then turned around and lied.
His reasoning to me-he sees the anxiety it gives me, he doesn't want to upset me, and he doesn't want to hear it from me.
Well excuse me. (and this is why I said waywards feel free to respond) I'm tolerating the fact that OW works for him daily. Every day he goes off to work and I'm at home worrying, the least he could do is tell me the truth. So this is where my question is:
How long does it take for the remorse to set in?
I know he's not having "relations" with her, and every day things get better, but the lies set me back. Keeping her a secret, keeps me at square one.
She also got separated last week and he says he didn't know about it. I struggle to believe that being he lies about little things, why not lie about big things?
He says he feels horrible, he says he feels guilt...and I believe that to an extent. Is there a time line on remorse? If so, someone please show it to me? He almost lost everything, he gambled with EVERYTHING-job, family, marriage, etc.