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How to out affair to workplace anonymously?

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kwash posted 9/3/2013 19:04 PM

All, I am a long time member and happily remarried after infidelity - so know that it can happen for you too!

I have a dear friend who recently found out that his fiancé is having an affair with her boss. She broke their engagement and he did some snooping and has concrete evidence of the affair. He confronted her and she gaslighted and lied, until he proved he knew. The boss was their friend and worse yet so was his wife. My friend told the wife and apparently they are divorcing.

My friend has accepted that their engagement is over (even though he did get her to go to counseling with him for 8 weeks in an effort to reconcile, while she kept on with her boss the whole time).

He now wants to out their affair to their workplace, but he wants to do so anonymously. I said I would be happy to help, but he really doesn't want it coming back to him in any way. Does anyone have advice or ideas about how to do this. They work in a government/military workplace, the boss is government and my friend's ex is a contractor.

Thanks in advance.

[This message edited by kwash at 7:05 PM, September 3rd (Tuesday)]

purplejacket4 posted 9/3/2013 19:13 PM

Send it to HR. Most businesses don't care UNLESS its the military or there is unethical monetary improprieties involved.

kwash posted 9/3/2013 19:19 PM

Thanks. I think they might care because they have high security clearances, work for a highly sensitive agency and she works directly under him. I believe the affair would be a conflict of interest for him (DOD) and possibly her too (big defense contractor).

I see the DOD has a confidential hotline. Possible her company does too. Would I report to both?

kwash posted 9/3/2013 19:32 PM

Her company has a hotline too. Think I am going to call each one.

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