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tryingmybest2011 posted 9/4/2013 08:21 AM

At home on mat leave with my newest daughter - just 14 weeks old. Man, is she a sweetheart. But I digress...

I'm feeling very weird and unsettled today. Yesterday I had a bad day with triggering - a product of too much time to think. I looked up the LTA OW, and saw a picture of her at a table having drinks with a bunch of girls. The girl in the foreground looks like my sister-in-law, but the picture is low-resolution, so I can't be sure. I sent an email to her yesterday to ask if it was her, and haven't heard back.

Also, I'm feeling very trapped. My WH can not be counted on to help me with any of this trauma - I have accepted that. Thing is, if I leave, I can surely get over this relationship, and have a satisfying life. But what about my daughters? They'll never get over it. So how can I sacrifice their childhood and intact family for my own peace? I can't. People say kids are resilient, but I think they are adaptive. I can't believe this is my life.

Ugh.

Thefly559 posted 9/4/2013 08:55 AM

we all have a similar situation . I am sorry you are here and the triggering I know all too well! The family and friends in my case chose sides immediately eventhough she cheated and destroyed our family they still hang out and party with her ! she had me removed from my home with lies the day after d day and she threw a party in my home right after ! her friends and family went ! the party was obviously to celebrate the removal of me! her cousin and I were best friends for thirty years and he knew for two years she was having an affair! so I would not be surprised if it was your sister in law . good luck and stay strong

tryingmybest2011 posted 9/4/2013 09:03 AM

fly, that is unbelievable. Terrible!