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Newest Member: SadInSalem (49875)

User Topic: Unbelievable
♂ 39948
Member # 39948
Default  Posted: 2:59 PM, September 4th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have not been to this site for almost a month. You folks got me through crap I never could have made it through alone. I can not believe how many "just found outs" there are in just a month!!!!!! I walked in on my wife having sex with another man, in my bed! I had just came home (unexpectedly) from the VA Hospital where I am treated for PTSD to tell my wife my lab results didn't look good. And there she was........ naked with another man, in my bed. I am a long way away from that day but I loaded my pistol and put it to my head. It scared the crap out of me that I would even go that far!!! I guess it isn't a good idea to give a woman everything she wants (that I am able to give) and make her number 1 in my life, because this is what it gets me. I never even allow myself to be alone with another woman, EVER, because I don't even want the temptation, even though I had no desire to betray her anyway.
I went off on a little bit of a rant but my main point was, look at all these fine people that have been betrayed by the one they trusted the most, IN JUST ONE MONTH!!!! People talk about problems that plague our country but this is a very clear and devastating issue that must change. I don't know how but something has to be the root cause here, that wasn't available years ago. When I was little people that committed immoral, adulterous acts, were shamed! As a little boy growing up in the 70's, divorce wasn't even an option, except for adultery or death of a spouse. Now one is able to enter into a marriage knowing they can easily opt-out by way of a "no fault" divorce. This just blows my mind because not everyone knows about this wonderful place to go to "lick your wounds". I feel sad for every one of you folks, it shouldn't be like this, it really shouldn't. We deserve better!

My handle is a name my grandpa gave me (ceilingwalker) because he used to tell me I drive him up the wall. LOL

Posts: 57 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: Phoenix
♀ 39588
Member # 39588
Default  Posted: 3:02 PM, September 4th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I told WS one time that we need a group like MADD. I feel so helpless and am angry when I see selfish jackasses hurting the people who love them the most.

Me (BS): 36
Him aka narcissistic psychopath (WS): 36
Married 17 years 6 kids ages 16-7
DDay #1 (EA) July '08
DDay #2 (EA/ONS- different OW) May 15, 2013

Finally this is R 8/14/13

Filed for divorce 5/8/15

Posts: 326 | Registered: Jun 2013
♀ 24210
Member # 24210
Default  Posted: 3:11 PM, September 4th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am always amazed at the number of registered members here as well.

I am a LONG way out from the JFO forum, but I do read there and empathize with everyone's situation.

I am not sure I agree the problem is any worse now than in the 70ies though. I think the availability of internet access to everything makes it more known (good like SI and bad like marital sex hook-up sites).

Just in my own little family, I know in the 70ies my father and both of his brothers were having As. Two of them opted to D, one opted to rugsweep.

It sucks no matter what generation you are in though {hugs}

[This message edited by EvenKeel at 3:12 PM, September 4th (Wednesday)]

Broken crayons still color...

Posts: 3143 | Registered: May 2009 | From: Pa
♂ 40199
Member # 40199
Default  Posted: 3:12 PM, September 4th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I may be 60 now, but I've always taken Semper Fi to apply to all aspects of life. I only wish others felt the same.

Like you, I am shocked at the number of people and the sad stories I read here.

Me–BS age 61
Her -- WS age 59
Married for 34 years
One child, 30yrs

Her 'A' 1994(?) through 1998
D-Day 7/4/2013 Yes, I didn't find out for almost 15 years... but the pain is just as bad as if she were with him last week.

Posts: 143 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: Near Houston Texas
♂ 40113
Member # 40113
Default  Posted: 4:15 PM, September 4th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Semper Fi.......always a good motto to have even if you are not in the Marines.

Your words are spot on, tirednconfused. Sad but true.

Posts: 59 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: New York City
♀ 39652
Member # 39652
Default  Posted: 4:47 PM, September 4th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It's a realization that haunts me every day.

I wish there was a way to change it, but for that to happen, people would have to understand honor, character, modesty, loyalty, and respect. And then actually want to live by them.

I don't believe our world teaches our youth what it actually means to commit to someone. They make the rules up as they go.

So pained to face this truth...

Me: BGF (48)
Him: WBF (nogoodap1), cheater and SA
Together for 3 years. Not sure how much longer.
I was blinded by this trauma, but no longer. He's showing me who he is, I'm finally paying attention. Time and the truth will decide the outcome.

Posts: 769 | Registered: Jun 2013
Topic Posts: 6

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