To add insult to injury, as they were notifying friends/family of his death, she discovered that he'd been having an A for the past 9 months. The OW did not know about my friend either, so she is innocent in this. My friend is dealing with such a range of emotions right now. She's grief stricken, but angry and hurt all at the same time.
I'm going over to spend time with her today and to help her sort through some of his paperwork. I'm just so heartbroken for her. It's really triggered me to a great extent about my own situation.
It did propel me to text the Gnat this morning and say the following. "While I'm still very angry at you and will probably never forgive you for the pain and hurt you've caused me, I don't want you dead. I'm sorry I said that to you". Yes, I did tell him I wished him dead once. Between what has happened to my friend and the poster who's WH committed suicide recently, I really don't wish this. I've received crickets from him, but that is fine. I don't need or even want him to respond.
Ugh, life is really hard, isn't it?
If you are comfortable doing so, you may want to consider sharing SI with her. You could do it without exposing yourself or your user ID - you can always say you saw a story about SI online.
Sending you strength as you help her through this. Hugs for her as well.
“The most difficult times for many of us are the ones we give ourselves.”
― Pema Chödrön
I know it's triggering you, but I'm glad she has you to help her through this.
So there's a possibility it was Xanax that killed him. It'll be interesting to see what the autopsy report says.
I told him the whole story, about the A and the Xanax. Then added, "sounds eerily familiar, right?" I've received crickets from that text, LOL. The Gnat doesn't like having a mirror put in his face.
I hope that she can come here for some support.
D-Day, June 10, 2012