Now I'm fuming. After my self control earlier in the day where I ignored mommy-dearest, they get my anger up. Friggin' double-team. Arghhh. I tried. I guess the best I can say is that I didn't continue engaging, and closed the door. Just frustrating.
I don't think you were out of line at all. Good for you for telling mommy dearest to butt out.
So her mother fully supports that her daughter is a cheating, lying, POS. That's Klassy!
I said something similar to my WW a couple of weeks ago (without the POS part). I couldn't understand how a mother-in-law that had always said what a good son-in-law I was good have been in a three-way communication with the AP and my wife in regards to my marriage. I even offered at one point to discuss this with my MIL, but she basically said her main concern is the my WW's health and the "best interest" of the kids. I haven't said anything to her since, until this afternoon.
And as I am walking through the door and about to close it I hear a mocking "blah blah blah" from the mother. Shitwads.
Go rough house and laugh with your kids-laughing while doing something physical with my kids worked wonders at clearing my mood from dealing with XH and NW .
You were brilliant.
In time you won't have these emotions about her at all - except for a touch of withering pity.
As NIK once so eloquently put it "They know which buttons to press because they installed the fuckers!".
Your give-a-fuck will be broken soon enough. Fake it till you make it. Let the anger wash over you and use it to strengthen your resolve to evict her from your heart and mind.
You are being far too hard on yourself. I think you showed super-human restraint. I promise you it will get easier the more you do it.
These days I don't struggle with not engaging - I struggle with not bursting out laughing.
You've so got this.
[This message edited by StrongButBroken at 8:01 AM, September 6th (Friday)]
Is D becoming more of an option? That kind of environment can't be helpful to the kids. Hell, it sounds like MIL needs to be kept away from them.
At some point(sorry to be blunt, but honest) your WW is going to pass. What will MIL do then?
I do know my wife is deathly afraid of my keeping the kids away from her mother once she passes. I'm not a vengeful sort, so I know I can't keep my kids away from their grandparents forever. In fact my main approach, in my mind, is that my kids are old enough to make their own decisions about whether they want to see them or not. My kids aren't my possessions to make those decisions for them, and ultimately, other than my wife's affair, they are well cared for by my wife and my inlaws when they are with them.
The main focus really is on myself right now. I have to feel better about my situation, so detaching as much as possible is my priority.