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bytheboard (original poster member #37741) posted at 4:22 PM on Friday, September 6th, 2013
I just can't take this pain anymore. I hate that every option is fucked up. I feel exactly like I did when I was raped. I feel like that 16 year old girl again... So wounded and with no hope of justice... Left to deal with it all alone. Expected to be the bigger person, to be "strong", to just deal with it. I have no choice here. I have to deal with it one way or the other. He did this to me and I can't change it.
BW: sparrow 34
WH: 45 SA(regretswhatidid)
DDays: 9/3/12 ,9/10/12 ,9/12/12 ,10/01/12 ,12/03/12, 2/24/12... quit counting most recent 4/19/17 all pre DDay but no end to TT
3x ONS= 2CL hook-ups,1 on TDY
46 Craigslist Ads, AFF, chatrooms,
4EA w/pas
shatteredheart7 ( member #39734) posted at 4:24 PM on Friday, September 6th, 2013
Me~40
FWH~46
Married 8yrs
Together 11 1/2
Me~ 3 kids, 21,17,14
Him~no kids
A with a mutual "friend" for 2+yrs
He confessed 9/9/12
A was over 2/12
7/13~ Happier than we have been in yrs!
TxsT ( member #39996) posted at 4:28 PM on Friday, September 6th, 2013
ByTheBoard....
Concentrate you yourself, heal yourself. He is of little significance right now. Go get so good IC.Move out if you have to. Separation from your biggest trigger will do you good.
T
Me: BS 50
Hubby: WH 53
Together: 32 years
Married: 25 years 09/10/2013
2 boys: 23&21
Dday: 09/11/2012
A length: 4+ years (yes years)
status: Ongoing Reconciliation :o)
Through thick and thin we will survive but he gets only one shot at it!
simpleD ( new member #40321) posted at 4:39 PM on Friday, September 6th, 2013
So sorry for your pain & struggle. The yo-yo effect of emotions can be horrible. I agree with TxsT that getting some IC and taking time away from WH, if possible, may be helpful. Can you ask him / tell him to leave? Take care of you & your needs right now.
BS(me)48; WH 49
High School Sweethearts
Together 32 years
Married 25 years
DD, 20 years
Dday 8/11
In Recovery
TxsT ( member #39996) posted at 4:40 PM on Friday, September 6th, 2013
Wow Simple.....our profile stats makes us look like twins but I am just a bit older 
T
Me: BS 50
Hubby: WH 53
Together: 32 years
Married: 25 years 09/10/2013
2 boys: 23&21
Dday: 09/11/2012
A length: 4+ years (yes years)
status: Ongoing Reconciliation :o)
Through thick and thin we will survive but he gets only one shot at it!
JanaGreen ( member #29341) posted at 5:21 PM on Friday, September 6th, 2013
((HUGS)) so very sorry. 
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