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Newest Member: Anderson78

Just Found Out :
My New Normal

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 erzulie (original poster member #3293) posted at 6:54 PM on Saturday, September 7th, 2013

I am a gal who thrives on routine. So, here's my "3 Days Post Discovery" routine I've formulated for myself to get through the morning:

Up at 6

Feed dogs

Walk dogs at 6:30

Set up coffee and breakfast at 7

Primal scream in the shower for 10 minutes at 7:15

Cry really, really hard for about 20 minutes at 7:30

Lay down and take four Advil at 7:50

Eat breakfast and drink coffee at 8:00

Cry a little bit more between 8 - 8:30

Calm down and start the rest of my day - 8:30

I have a feeling this is going to be my morning routine for a while. Is this normal?

God, I wish there was a way to tell the dogs that this will pass, and that everything will be okay. They look so panicked and concerned.

A saying for my SI Family: "We may not have it all together, but together we have it all".

Fooled twice - almost exactly 10 years apart.

posts: 3380   ·   registered: Jan. 27th, 2004   ·   location: California
id 6477942
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cliffside ( member #38803) posted at 7:01 PM on Saturday, September 7th, 2013

Hugs to you. I am so sorry you've had to go through this twice - that is my worst nightmare.

Can you add this into your routine:

8:30: Look in mirror and know I am strong, ridden of a lying POS, and I will get through this and have a better life.

Hugs, hugs, hugs to you and your pups.

Me: BS 39
Him: WH 41
2 Kids
D-Day: 2/3/13
Broke NC 3/14, broke again 1/23/15
180ing, in a state of WTFness

posts: 304   ·   registered: Mar. 25th, 2013
id 6477945
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Broken6 ( member #40347) posted at 7:02 PM on Saturday, September 7th, 2013

Hugs to you to begin every day. Nothing is normal about the situations we have found ourselves in. So, in saying that, nothing you are doing is abnormal. The rollercoaster ride is such hell. I will never go to an amusement park again and ride a rollercoaster for fun. This emotional one has cured me of that urge. I am glad you have the puppies to comfort you. I have one too, and he lays by my side every time I cry. He is is such a good little support system. You deserve happiness, and I hope it will come sooner than later. I don't know what to offer because I am new to this, but your daily routine sounds like a good one for now. Do what helps you, make you the priority right now. That is the advice people are giving me. I do want off the ride though. Wonder when it will stop?

The grass isn't greener on the other side, it is greener where you water it.

posts: 58   ·   registered: Aug. 17th, 2013
id 6477947
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tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 9:15 PM on Saturday, September 7th, 2013

I agree with cliffside you need to start some positive self statements.

I am strong I am capable I will be happy. Today is a new start.

Keep saying it until it starts tO become true. Let your pups comfort you everyday. They are concerned over the grief you are feeling. They love you and can provide you comfort strength and even a reason to keep pushing.

Me: FBSHim: FWSKids: 23 & 27 Married for 32 years now, was 16 at the time.D-Day Sept 26 2008R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 20380   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 6478064
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