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Wayward Side :
A tiny step forward

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 NoGoodUsername (original poster member #40181) posted at 1:29 AM on Monday, September 9th, 2013

My BW and I are sort of having a date this coming Friday.

Several months ago, I had purchased a subscription package to a local theater and we are going to use the first set of tickets in a few days. We're not making this a big romantic thing but it is something that we have enjoyed in the past and I'm hoping it will be a good shared experience.

Things aren't perfect but we've both been trying hard on the good days and the bad. I'm lucky to be married to this woman. Here's to being careful, doing the right things and my luck holding.

Me: WH
Her: BW
Dday 7/11/13
"May you be protected from hearts that are not humble, tongues that are not wise and eyes that have forgotten how to cry."

posts: 275   ·   registered: Aug. 5th, 2013
id 6479280
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TimeToManUp ( member #37538) posted at 2:07 AM on Monday, September 9th, 2013

Good luck! Be prepared for triggers... I feel like movies can be a minefield in that you never know what may pop up. And if she does trigger, it is an opportunity for you to show her the changes you have made in yourself and prove you are a safe person for her to be with. Like I've said to another WH... Success is a combination of preparedness and opportunity. You never know when opportunity will present itself, so always be prepared. Again, good luck and have fun!

I know we're worth it.
WH/BH (Me-36) EA 11/11-12/11
BW/WW (tattoodchinadoll-34) EA early 2016, PA 8/16-9/16, Continued to 12/16 after discovery.
Together nearly 20 years, married for 14.
Three daughters, 12, 8 and 5.

posts: 230   ·   registered: Nov. 18th, 2012   ·   location: New Jersey
id 6479332
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 NoGoodUsername (original poster member #40181) posted at 2:15 AM on Monday, September 9th, 2013

Thank you!

It's a play and we know the subject matter. We were both careful to be sure there are no links to infidelity or anything to do with the AP. Regardless, your advice about potential pitfalls is well taken and I'll be both careful and prepared.

Me: WH
Her: BW
Dday 7/11/13
"May you be protected from hearts that are not humble, tongues that are not wise and eyes that have forgotten how to cry."

posts: 275   ·   registered: Aug. 5th, 2013
id 6479344
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TxsT ( member #39996) posted at 5:52 AM on Monday, September 9th, 2013

NOGood....

If she triggers hold her tight. You don't have to say anything but showing her you get why she might be triggering will be very comforting to her. She will know you get part of her pain. If there is a trigger, after the show, be brave and bring it up. Let her know you are sorry she felt bad, or that you could see how what ever it was could make her trigger.....trust me on this....BS's know what other BS's need :o)

Good luck. I am happy you are doing something normal together. Great step in the right direction!

T

[This message edited by TxsT at 11:53 PM, September 8th (Sunday)]

Me: BS 50
Hubby: WH 53
Together: 32 years
Married: 25 years 09/10/2013
2 boys: 23&21
Dday: 09/11/2012
A length: 4+ years (yes years)
status: Ongoing Reconciliation :o)

Through thick and thin we will survive but he gets only one shot at it!

posts: 605   ·   registered: Jul. 24th, 2013   ·   location: CDN
id 6479586
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