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User
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Topic: He gave the winning answer.
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Flatlined123
♀ 35862
Member # 35862 |  Posted: 7:39 PM, September 8th (Sunday), 2013 |     |
H and I were talking in the car today and I asked him what he would do if he ever felt the way he did before the affair happened again. How does he know he won't do it again?
His answer was: No matter what, I will never hurt you like that again. I've seen you struggle with the pain I caused and nothing is worth doing that to you again. I hurt myself too. I don't ever want either one of us to go through this again.
I think we're getting there. 
Me: BS H: WS
4 kids
DD #1 7-11-08
DD#2 8-21-09 same OW, A never ended.
Started R in 12-09
"If what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, I should be able to bench press a Buick."
Posts: 946 | Registered: Jun 2012 |
MovingUpward
♂ 14866
Member # 14866 |  Posted: 7:42 PM, September 8th (Sunday), 2013 | |
Posts: 54405 | Registered: Jun 2007 |
AFrayedKnot
♂ 36622
Member # 36622 | | Posted: 7:54 PM, September 8th (Sunday), 2013 | |
BS 42
fWS 38 (SurprisinglyOkay)
DsD DS
A whole bunch of shit that got a lot worse before it got better.
"Knowing is half the battle"
Posts: 2859 | Registered: Aug 2012 |
authenticnow
♀ 16024
Member # 16024 | | Posted: 8:12 PM, September 8th (Sunday), 2013 | |
Mr. Flatlined is 'getting it'.
Happy for both of you! 
“Empathy has no script. There is no right way or wrong way to do it. It’s simply listening, holding space, withholding judgment, emotionally connecting, and communicating that incredibly healing message of “you’re not alone.” ~ Brene Brown
Posts: 54995 | Registered: Sep 2007 |
shatteredheart7
♀ 39734
Member # 39734 | | Posted: 8:17 PM, September 8th (Sunday), 2013 | |
Me~40
FWH~46
Married 8yrs
Together 11 1/2
Me~ 3 kids, 21,17,14
Him~no kids
A with a mutual "friend" for 2+yrs
He confessed 9/9/12
A was over 2/12
7/13~ Happier than we have been in yrs!
Posts: 240 | Registered: Jul 2013 |
Flatlined123
♀ 35862
Member # 35862 | | Posted: 8:47 PM, September 8th (Sunday), 2013 | |
I know, right Chicho? It's been so nice to see and hear the things from him. I feel like the hard work is finally paying off.
Me: BS H: WS
4 kids
DD #1 7-11-08
DD#2 8-21-09 same OW, A never ended.
Started R in 12-09
"If what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, I should be able to bench press a Buick."
Posts: 946 | Registered: Jun 2012 |
emotionalgirl
♀ 40184
Member # 40184 | | Posted: 10:03 PM, September 8th (Sunday), 2013 | |
1st D day: Saturday July 20,2013
2nd D day....when the s**t really hit the fan and the truth came out.Saturday August 3,2013
3rd D day: Friday August 16, 2013...NC sent Friday Aug 30 4th D day NOV 11
Me: BS
Him: WH
Married 25 years....finally in R
Posts: 377 | Registered: Aug 2013 |
nekorb
♀ 40306
Member # 40306 | | Posted: 10:24 PM, September 8th (Sunday), 2013 | |
That's awesome!
Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 M - 22 Years
D-day: 7/2013; D filed 7/2014; Divorced 7-27-16
...the WS affair starts off in a dreamland where everything is all Golly, Wow! and Meant To Be! and Soul Mates drop from the trees to frolic in the mist. -devotedman
Posts: 5580 | Registered: Aug 2013 |
TxsT
♀ 39996
Member # 39996 | | Posted: 11:31 PM, September 8th (Sunday), 2013 | |
We had the very same conversation this afternoon. We had stopped for a picnic in the mountains on our way home from celebrating our 25th anniversary. I chose a beautiful spot over looking the glacier river. We had champagne, cheese, grapes......and just us. My H said that this whole event has opened his eyes so wide. So much was unknown to him before the A. He didn't know how much I was missing our marriage and how much pain I was carrying. My courage and strength have made him see how horribly wrong he had been. He too said he will never hurt me that way again....he had no idea that this much hurt could be endured. He also said he is a very lucky man that I have wanted to put this behind us. It was a beautiful moment for me. I felt all my hard work had finally rewarded me.
T
Me: BS 50
Hubby: WH 53
Together: 32 years
Married: 25 years 09/10/2013
2 boys: 23&21
Dday: 09/11/2012
A length: 4+ years (yes years)
status: Ongoing Reconciliation :o)
Through thick and thin we will survive but he gets only one shot at it!
Posts: 605 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: CDN |
Flatlined123
♀ 35862
Member # 35862 | | Posted: 4:52 AM, September 9th (Monday), 2013 | |
T, I'm so glad for you both.
It's nice to have a little peace in our lives.
Me: BS H: WS
4 kids
DD #1 7-11-08
DD#2 8-21-09 same OW, A never ended.
Started R in 12-09
"If what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, I should be able to bench press a Buick."
Posts: 946 | Registered: Jun 2012 |
catlover50
♀ 37154
Member # 37154 | | Posted: 8:17 AM, September 9th (Monday), 2013 | |
Dday -9/23/2012
Reconciling
Posts: 2284 | Registered: Oct 2012 | From: northeast |
TxsT
♀ 39996
Member # 39996 | | Posted: 1:53 PM, September 9th (Monday), 2013 | |
Flat.....it is nice that we are both seeing the product of all of our hard work. I don't care if you are a BS or a WS, getting to positive is wonderful.
T
Me: BS 50
Hubby: WH 53
Together: 32 years
Married: 25 years 09/10/2013
2 boys: 23&21
Dday: 09/11/2012
A length: 4+ years (yes years)
status: Ongoing Reconciliation :o)
Through thick and thin we will survive but he gets only one shot at it!
Posts: 605 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: CDN |
| Topic Posts: 12 | |
