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TxsT (original poster member #39996) posted at 5:41 AM on Monday, September 9th, 2013
This weekend has shown me that there is nothing in this world my H and I can't do together. If two people put their heart and soul behind something, hard work, honesty, communication and respect will win out in the end.
This week will mark my 25th wedding anniversary and our 1 year Dday anniversary. A year ago I was in an incredible world of hurt. I was almost hospitalized because I was becoming dangerous to my self. I felt my world was over, the reason to go on was over, that I had thrown away my whole life for what.......NOTHING. My road has not been an easy one, nor is the roads all of you are following. But it is a road I finally, in my heart, had to embrace fully before I knew it could be possible. I had to purge the hate, the mind movies, the triggers. For myself I had to start thinking POSITIVELY. It didn't happen over night but slowly, with the help of my wonderful MC/IC, my doctor, my friends and my loving H I was able to say....THIS WILL NOT DEFINE ME. THIS WILL NOT DEFEAT ME! I WILL NOT LET THIS MAKE ME FEEL HORRIBLE ANY MORE. Until I was able to believe that any direction was better then the downward spiral I was on, I was loosing my self and my sanity.
I chose to heal myself, for me, so I could one day be happy. At that point in time I still did not know if that happiness included my WH or not and he knew that. I allowed myself to chose not throwing away 32 years of my life. I stopped caring what others would think and started listening to what it was I wanted.
Now, 1 year later we are well on our way to creating possibly the best marriage we could have ever dreamed of. Is there still ups and downs....oh yeah....but we deal with them and move on. I am so pleased with the way things have turned out and I am so grateful that I had the courage to say try. What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.
T
[This message edited by TxsT at 11:43 PM, September 8th (Sunday)]
Me: BS 50
Hubby: WH 53
Together: 32 years
Married: 25 years 09/10/2013
2 boys: 23&21
Dday: 09/11/2012
A length: 4+ years (yes years)
status: Ongoing Reconciliation :o)
Through thick and thin we will survive but he gets only one shot at it!
mesoSTUPID ( member #35679) posted at 5:45 AM on Monday, September 9th, 2013
Like!
ME (BS): 41 and so stupid!
Him (WH): 43. He's my dragon slayer but my heart wasn't supposed to be slayed!
TxsT (original poster member #39996) posted at 5:53 AM on Monday, September 9th, 2013
Thank you me......it was such a great weekend!!!!
T
Me: BS 50
Hubby: WH 53
Together: 32 years
Married: 25 years 09/10/2013
2 boys: 23&21
Dday: 09/11/2012
A length: 4+ years (yes years)
status: Ongoing Reconciliation :o)
Through thick and thin we will survive but he gets only one shot at it!
Teardrop29 ( new member #40297) posted at 7:14 AM on Monday, September 9th, 2013
Txst,
I am sincerely and deeply happy for you. I'm in a rut right now, but I hope I will someday have the courage to accept and be positive. I hope to be where you are someday. I applaud you for your strength.
BS: me (29)
WH: 37
Together 4 yrs, Married 3 years
2 children: DS 2yrs/ DD 3mos
Needadrink ( member #40512) posted at 10:23 AM on Monday, September 9th, 2013
It is great to hear where you are now. I truly believe that I will be in the same place as you it's great to know that people come through this stronger. It is 3 months since D Day for me and i still have very bad days but I know deep in my heart that my H loves me and I love him. Thanks again
BS 57
WH 58
M 28 yrs together 32
D Day 10th April 2013
20 Yrs of Infidelity with long term affair 18 yrs but only seen a couple of times a year. 3 Prostitutes, sexual Massages.Ongoing Porn. lapdances.
shatteredheart7 ( member #39734) posted at 12:01 PM on Monday, September 9th, 2013
So happy for you!!!
Seems like it was a positive weekend for us both. This is also 1yr for me and I made that same decision, after I "killed" her off. Things are looking up
Me~40
FWH~46
Married 8yrs
Together 11 1/2
Me~ 3 kids, 21,17,14
Him~no kids
A with a mutual "friend" for 2+yrs
He confessed 9/9/12
A was over 2/12
7/13~ Happier than we have been in yrs!
StillStanding1 ( member #40144) posted at 12:52 PM on Monday, September 9th, 2013
Me: BS50s Him: WH50s
M 25 years - DD DS DS
LTA = 2+ yrs, Dday - 2/13, S for 1 year, now R
lucy17 ( member #40187) posted at 1:12 PM on Monday, September 9th, 2013
Thank you so much for such a positive post! I am truly happy for you and admire your strength and honesty as well as your words of wisdom.
“The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong at the broken places." Hemingway
Me- BS 38
Him- WS 44
1 child- 13 years old
together 21 years, legally married 17
Dday1- 7/7/13
Dday2- 8/12/13
The rollercoaster of R
TxsT (original poster member #39996) posted at 1:38 PM on Monday, September 9th, 2013
Thank you everyone
it is a great milestone in many ways!
Still...just keep swimming, swimming, swimming!!!!
Shattered....I seem to recall your"killing her off" post. It made me laugh so hard....I could really relate. I have never killed mine off but I did get to text with her directly and I know my in sights for her were VERY HARSH indeed
To everyone else....keep making yourselves better. It is through your own strength that you will succeed, be it with your WS or not!
T
Me: BS 50
Hubby: WH 53
Together: 32 years
Married: 25 years 09/10/2013
2 boys: 23&21
Dday: 09/11/2012
A length: 4+ years (yes years)
status: Ongoing Reconciliation :o)
Through thick and thin we will survive but he gets only one shot at it!
catlover50 ( member #37154) posted at 2:15 PM on Monday, September 9th, 2013
Good for you both!
Dday -9/23/2012
Reconciled
TxsT (original poster member #39996) posted at 9:23 PM on Monday, September 9th, 2013
Thank you.....it has been a lot of hard work. But I have enjoyed the outcome and couldn't be more pleased.
T
Me: BS 50
Hubby: WH 53
Together: 32 years
Married: 25 years 09/10/2013
2 boys: 23&21
Dday: 09/11/2012
A length: 4+ years (yes years)
status: Ongoing Reconciliation :o)
Through thick and thin we will survive but he gets only one shot at it!
Amber13 ( member #40505) posted at 10:01 PM on Monday, September 9th, 2013
What a lovely post, thank you!
Skan ( member #35812) posted at 1:02 AM on Tuesday, September 10th, 2013
What a wonderful post! I'm so glad that the two of you are building a stronger, much better tomorrow!
Imagine a ship trying to set sail while towing an anchor. Cutting free is not a gift to the anchor. You must release that burden, not because the anchor is worthy, but because the ship is.
D-Day, June 10, 2012
learningtofeel ( member #39543) posted at 1:33 AM on Tuesday, September 10th, 2013
Your post lifts my hopes. We are approaching six months and doing well - complete with ups and downs. I'm getting used to the idea of trusting the process because I can see that the downs are not forever and the ups just keep getting better. Thank you for sharing your good news and helping the rest of us keep going.
M 1989
3 young adult kids
D-Day 4.13.13
WS (him): 7 OW over 15 years
BS (me): had no clue
D-Day 2: 10.19.19, OW#8, a co-worker
Told him I was DONE
ccw82 ( member #40133) posted at 1:47 AM on Tuesday, September 10th, 2013
T, you never cease to amaze me with your inspiration! You have such a kind, wonderful personality...it's difficult not to like you!
I am so glad that you and your H had a great weekend. Happy Anniversary, and here's to 25 more!!!
Me (BW): 39
WXH (1DumbHusband): 43
We were married for over 11 years; now divorced.
BIG D-Day: June 17th, 2013
Too many freaking TTs that cost us our marriage in the end.
"Love isn't a feeling, it's a choice."
TxsT (original poster member #39996) posted at 2:36 AM on Tuesday, September 10th, 2013
Sadly I have to report that there will not be any hoochie Cochise thanks to my kidney procedure but that didn't stop me from buying a few appropriate card and getting us dinner reservations
T
Me: BS 50
Hubby: WH 53
Together: 32 years
Married: 25 years 09/10/2013
2 boys: 23&21
Dday: 09/11/2012
A length: 4+ years (yes years)
status: Ongoing Reconciliation :o)
Through thick and thin we will survive but he gets only one shot at it!
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