It does not matter. In a way calling him on it gives him a button to push when he decides to be a fuckwit again.
Cheaters lie, liars cheat. You need to lower your expectations here.
You are/were absolutely entitled to make the request but now that you have further verification that he is a liar you need to let it go (unless OW is a danger to your children).
Please know I KNOW how hard this option is to take. Ever fibre of your being is screaming at you to keep OW away from your precious children. I absolutely understand. But this is not in your control long term - if she moves in with him or marries him there is no law that will keep her away from your children.
You could delay it but there will be a huge drama tax to pay. For you, for your kids.
Control what you can, surrender to what you can not.
It is very very important to reduce the number of buttons they have to push.
It is so ethically wrong for OW to be around our kids. Unfortunately the law does not allow for common decency.
((sleepless34)) You will have to work with him in regards to parenting your children whether or not you trust him. I don't trust the sad clown as far as I could throw his non-existent integrity but I have no choice but to work with him. Parallel parenting is as good as it gets for most of us.
ETA: don't expect in S/D what you didn't get in your M. That is my mantra and everyone should make it theirs.
I'm so sorry friend. I know how much it burns. I really do. We all do.
Another hug for you ((sleepless34)).
When the time comes for my SO to meet the girls I know it will burn the sad clown - but he doesn't have an OM to contend with so it will never burn him as much as OWUmpteen being around my girls burns me.
Fuck.That.Guy. - all of them.
[This message edited by StrongButBroken at 4:17 AM, September 9th (Monday)]