This is the hall of mirrors. Where you will face yourself. Buckle up.
QS has been working incredibly long, grueling hours the past few weeks. Its been very hard on us. Always is. Had some traumas to deal with and most of our communication was via text/call. That was difficult. Somehow we've managed to hang on.
It was rumored he may get a day off. I kept quiet, but prayed feverishly and kept my fingers crossed. He promised me Tuesday. Tomorrow. I told him for safety purposes, I'm hiding his wallet, keys, and phone. After I power it off of course.
Its really happening. When he gets home tonight, he's mine for the next 36 hours. I'm kinda nervous. Excited. Nervous. Happy. Nervous. Ok, serious case of butterflies. Which makes no sense because we've been married for 10 years. At this point, after all we've been thru, why the nerves?
Maybe it has to do with a shakeup this week and a realization that I'm a taker in ever sense of the word. And he's a giver. And I don't want him to just give. If all he does is give, at some point, will he have any give left to give? I mean, doesn't a giver tire of only giving all the time? Does giving eventually just suck the life out of a giver? Yeah, its opened a can of worms for us. So I've been working on giving and not taking. I feel like an hour old calf. Shaky and scared. But kind of excited.
So yeah. Unexpected day off. Unexpected time together. On a random Tuesday. With no plans other than sleeping in, getting coffee, and enjoying one another. All day.
"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne