We were having an argument Sunday and it started because I didn't knock on the bathroom door when she was in there taking a shower. Instead I just opened the door.
Her daughter asked what she could have for a snack and I went to relay the question. Now she has said numerous times that I am not allowed in there when she's taking a shower and to respect her privacy.. And I didn't listen.
I had been reading "Not just friends" before she got in the shower and was reading it after she came out of getting dressed. and I got heated to the point where I threw the book in anger.. something I'm not proud of. and I needed to cool down and walked into the bathroom to calm down because I wasn't liking who I was. and while doing that she proceeded to rip the book up which crushed me because I really wanted to read the book.
so I come out and clean it up and lay down. then when all the arguing had stopped I said to her and we were arguing calmly I said "I wont help anymore" (or something to that nature) which I would never do I love helping as much as I can. which infuriated her.
The freedoms I have lost are things in the nature of visiting a friend without her or pretty much doing most things without her involving other people. Going to a bar to meet a friend for a drink or two. Being able to make plans last minute involving going somewhere.
Keep in mind I'm ok with all of this I can accept so much because while I care about a lot of my friends most of them are shit people. As far as their sense of humor or their way of handling their relationships. My BGF is my best friend and I spend more time with her in 3 days than I do with other friends in 6 months. So if I lose friendships because of their not understanding me then they weren't a real friend anyways and some have already been lost that way. Others by choice.
What things do you need to do so you can live an authentic life for the rest of your life?
There is so much stuff that I am working on now. but I still have a lot to learn.... I just know I need to do whatever it takes to make her happy.
What are your values? What ones do you want to keep, and what ones do you want to change?
my values are changing for the better every day. Most of my old values sucked and I'm still overhauling my entire core to make me a better man than who I was back then.