Can totally understand the wall thing with a hubby who travels away for work. I did exactly what you did, built big walls around my heart so the hurt didn't hurt every time he left. The walls got so think they eventually kept everything out, including H.
Luckily, H has a new job now and does not travel. We don't have to deal with this unless one of us has to fly to help out our children.
Through thick and thin we will survive but he gets only one shot at it!