Topic: 6 years later...
Member # 16472
| Posted: 1:58 PM, September 12th (Thursday), 2013|
Hard to believe it's been more than six years since I nearly lost everything. Since a series of choices I made nearly had the consequence of destroying the best things that have ever happened to me in my life. My wife. My kids. My life.
Last night Wells asked me if I ever think about what I nearly lost. Truth is I think about it almost daily. Yes, still today. I've said before that a person may be able to become a FWS by doing the work they need to never make those choices again. But there is no such thing as a FBS. Once betrayed, it's betrayal for life. As the one who caused that pain and hurt, I know exactly what I nearly lost, and I am grateful each day that she chooses to remain my wife and to share the journey of life together.
Through all we've been through, my BW has chosen to stay with me. She chose R because she wanted it and believed it was possible. For that gift, I will forever be thankful.
Given two people dedicated to the effort, and especially a WS willing to accept responsiblity for their actions and to do the work necessary to make sure they never happen again, R is possible. And the reward is huge for a WS - to live each day knowing they have been given the ultimate gift. The willingness of someone they cut to the core to try again and to believe in the possibility of the future.
BW(her)- 45, FWH (me) 48
4 month Online EA
M 24 years, together for 28
4 Daughters - 21, 18, 14 and 12
d-day 6/2/07, in R
"Action expresses priorities." -
Posts: 4472 | Registered: Oct 2007 | From: One Particular Harbour
Member # 6449
| Posted: 2:06 PM, September 12th (Thursday), 2013|
((((LC & wife)))) hugs to you both and best wishes on your journey together.
~~"You can't run away from yourself"!!! Me to my H when he descended into adultery insanity.
~~Prov.15:13 "By sorrow of the heart the spirit is broken"
~~"The day breaks-your mind aches"
Posts: 9922 | Registered: Feb 2005 | From: Texas
Member # 30024
| Posted: 2:09 PM, September 12th (Thursday), 2013|
Great post, Listening, thanks for sharing.
the reward is huge for a WS - to live each day knowing they have been given the ultimate gift. The willingness of someone they cut to the core to try again and to believe in the possibility of the future. This is so true. I feel that my FWH is just amazed by me and the willingness I had to give him a chance. He is seeing me with all new eyes. He is actually finally seeing me without all his projected garbarge on me.
Very happy for you and Wells.
BW (me) 50ish FWH 50ish
Married 34 years, 3 children
d-day 3/10 LTA (4 yrs./fucking & flirting)
"Oh, why do my actions have consequences?" ~ Homer Simpson
"She knew my one weakness: That I'm weak!" ~ Homer Simpson
Posts: 10117 | Registered: Nov 2010 | From: The Great White North USA
Member # 19197
| Posted: 3:44 PM, September 12th (Thursday), 2013|
Great and hopeful post for all to enjoy. Glad you and your family are doing well.
Married 30 yrs. w/ 2 grown kids
Dday 1: Very early 2007
Dday 2: Mid 2008 (same MOW, 14 month false R)
The affair was the aberration, not the marriage or the man.
Posts: 822 | Registered: Apr 2008
Member # 21761
| Posted: 5:51 PM, September 12th (Thursday), 2013|
Great to see you, LC! Thanks for the update.
"Feedback is the breakfast of champions." - Boris Becker
Posts: 6128 | Registered: Nov 2008 | From: California
Member # 16024
| Posted: 5:53 PM, September 12th (Thursday), 2013|
Hi LC! We joined around the same time and it's great to see you checking in!
Thanks for the post. I get it!
Take up your space (and do it well).
"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."
Posts: 39076 | Registered: Sep 2007
Member # 12802
| Posted: 5:56 PM, September 12th (Thursday), 2013|
From time to time, I do consider that I might be mad. Like any self-respecting lunatic, however, I am always quick to dismiss any doubts about my sanity. DK
Posts: 14879 | Registered: Nov 2006 | From: mercury's underboob
Member # 31349
| Posted: 5:59 PM, September 12th (Thursday), 2013|
"Welcome the rawness of vulnerability as an opportunity to open." - Pema Chodron
Me: BW 35
Crazz: WH 33
Daughter: 4.5 Going on 16
Posts: 18750 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
Member # 15162
| Posted: 8:07 PM, September 12th (Thursday), 2013|
FBH - 42
FWW - 43 (BrokenRoad)
2 kids 7&12
The people you do your life with shape the life you live
Posts: 37936 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Michigan
|Topic Posts: 9|