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He reached out for me!

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soconfusednow posted 9/12/2013 22:41 PM

We were talking about how certain things trigger me & I told him one of the things I needed was for him to reach out & hug me without being asked. Although I was sad at the time, no hug came.

Later in the evening our paths were crossing, he could have just walked around me. Instead he opened his arms for me to enter and receive a hug, not just any hug, but the best hug I've had in a while!

[This message edited by soconfusednow at 10:44 PM, September 12th (Thursday)]

sinsof thefather posted 9/13/2013 02:52 AM

I'm glad he acted on what you asked him and gave you what you needed. I hope this positive step from him is the start of a permanent change in this regard.

ok4now posted 9/13/2013 04:12 AM

So confused for now

That is awesome. I know a year after Dday. I finally told my WH what I needed. I know it sounds stupid but I explained when I triggered or brought up the EA what I needed was reassurance. Him to hug me or tell me he is sorry, or he loved me.

This was our light bulb moment. He told me he thought when I brought up the past I was looking for an argument and he would immediately get into his passive aggressive stage.

IC for him definitely helped with our communication and with him pulling away when I wanted to talk about it.

AFrayedKnot posted 9/13/2013 05:03 AM

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