Cheating Hurt by Infidelity
Betrayal Wayward Donations lying



Find a Local Counselor

The Healing Library


Contact Us
In Association with
Infidelity -
- Forum Archives

like us on facebook
You are not logged in. Login here or register.
Newest Member: Goodboy (61889)

User Topic: Another tentative start - better than the last!
♀ 32662
Member # 32662
Default  Posted: 3:49 AM, September 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

A quick update for anyone who remembers the last guy I was "seeing" (read - being kissed by while drunk mostly). We had a weekend sports tournament, he was kind of a jerk, I cried a bunch and then my friend told me I was being obsessive and I needed to snap out of it.

It's at the point now where it was my birthday a few days ago, and I completely ignored his text. Next...

And I'm kind of liking someone else. So far, he seems quite different than this last guy. He's open about his feelings. He told me he likes me, took me out for a birthday dinner and then came out to my big birthday drinks event after work and met some of my friends. He's introduced me to a friend of his, and we've spent time just hanging out at his house watching TV. He says nice things - about how I look and how I act and I'm not often guessing at what's going on with him, which is really great.

Where we're up to so far is we see each other pretty often. The first few times I spent the night at his it was just that it got so late when we were talking that it wasn't a good idea to walk home and I made him stay fully clothed and we just cuddled till really late. Things have gotten progressively more physical, but only after I asked him if he was hooking up with anyone else, and if he was intending to. Both were the answers I wanted to hear.

He knows about the ex, both the cheating and the other bad stuff that went on, and he was nothing but sweet and lovely, and said (without my asking) that he has every intention of being really open so I have no need to worry or wonder. I don't want to make him pay for exs mistakes and am going to try my best not to do so.. but that was really, really nice to hear as well. The other night, totally unprompted, he said he wants me to feel safe in his arms...

We haven't put a label on it yet. We've really only known each other a month, and he says he feels like it's too early, even though things have been going really fast in other aspects - meeting friends, spending loads of time together, being in touch lots throughout the day. That 5% made me a bit sad, even though I know it's not a good idea to rush things just for the sake of it. And overall, he's open and makes plans for the future with me so I feel pretty comfortable that things are heading in a decent direction.

But, of course, I'm a bit nervous. I'm actually getting a bit close to him, which is a new one for me. We recently had sex for the first time (after a nice chat about exclusivity and him saying he's still going to be there in the morning and nothing's going to change between us - he's really into me, etc etc) and it was really nice. And also, I think our contact has slowed down slightly (which is normal, I think, because we were talking an awful lot!) and I'm just suddenly a tiny bit nervous even though he's not really given me a reason to be. Is that just a new-relationship thing? I'm kind of scared of it fizzling because it's been so awesome but quick so far.

I like him, and he's said he likes me. And more importantly, he acts like he likes me. I'm just waiting to see what happens next...

[This message edited by Crash! at 3:58 AM, September 13th (Friday)]

I got out. I think I saved myself.

Posts: 65 | Registered: Jul 2011 | From: UK
♀ 33226
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 12:46 PM, September 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sounds like a good start, Crash.

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

Posts: 40250 | Registered: Aug 2011
♂ 38122
Member # 38122
Default  Posted: 5:32 PM, September 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Me: 1970
Two sons: 2000 and 2003
Cheating louse: What's her name again?

Married Aug/95
DDay Nov/12
Separated Mar/13
Finally divorced Jul/17

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous!

Posts: 3623 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: Ontario, Canada
♀ 30341
Member # 30341
Default  Posted: 5:40 PM, September 13th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think the nervousness is just a part of the whole new relationship thing. Enjoy and best of luck to you!!

DDay 11/17/2010 BW:54

Posts: 4137 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Iowa
Topic Posts: 4

Return to Forum This Topic is Archived
© 2002 - 2017 All Rights Reserved.