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kg201 (original poster member #40173) posted at 3:52 PM on Saturday, September 14th, 2013
I was in a good mindset heading home to switch with my WW for the child care. She even made breakfast with the idea that I would eat with them, as a sign of goodwill.
Of course then I started asking questions, which I know I shouldn't have and it quickly spiraled out of control, and it ended with her making threats about D and getting full custody, and me yelling in the house about her the AP and I going to hell together (which ticked her off further because of the kids hearing).
Blah. I'm better than that, but she got me with her blame-shifting. Starting back at 0.
One issue that she kept bringing up is my posting about our conversations on-line. So I invited her to join us here, told her my handle and that I am not embarrassed by anything I have posted. Since she has no interest in helping me heal, then my posting and your replies are my current need.
So if she does show up, then please welcome my WW to SI. Hopefully she will finally learn a little about what affairs do to people and their families.
Me: BH, 40
Her: Ms. Daisy
Together 18 years, married 15+
LTA 3.5 years, living together
Dday: 7/28/13
Ds17, DS12, DD12
Divorced! 2/24/2015
Apology. You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.
nomistakeaboutit ( member #36857) posted at 6:09 PM on Saturday, September 14th, 2013
Cordial drop off, good. Sharing meals, bad.
Gently here, my friend......
Every experience of trauma like this, for your kids, will likely stay with them for the rest of their lives. Maybe you and your wife can factor that in, when deciding if you are still capable of even interacting with each other in front of your kids.
Me: BH 65.........Her: WW 55
DD: 15.......DS: 12. (5 and 2 on DDay)
Married for six years.
DDay: 12-25-11 Divorced: 7-15-12
...................................
HurtsButImOK ( member #38865) posted at 7:36 PM on Saturday, September 14th, 2013
What nomistakeaboutit said and - again gently here - an unremorseful WW is unlikely to be willing to learn anything from others experience. They seem to cling tightly to their justifications and dismiss all that do not support them to continue their behaviours.
I hope you still have a safe place to post and receive support going forward.
Me: Awesome - 35.... ummm, not anymore
"I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel". –Maya Angelou
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