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StillLivin posted 9/14/2013 12:06 PM

I Just FounD Out WH Moved His Mistress In.
I Thought He Couldn't Possibly Hurt Me Anymore. I Thought Because I Made Up My Mind To File For D When He Gets Back For Good From Afghanistan That I Couldn't Possibly Still Love Him So Much. Why Does This Hurt.So Much? Why Can't I Stop Crying? I Feel Like My Soul Is Being Ripped Out.
I Just Want THe Pain To Go Away. I've Been Doing So Great These Last 2 Weeks With 180.

LosferWords posted 9/14/2013 12:08 PM

(((StillLivin)))

I'm so sorry for your pain... we're here for you to lean on.

HurtsButImOK posted 9/14/2013 13:52 PM

It hurts because it is another knife to the heart. It hurts because, whilst you are moving yourself forward with D, it takes a while for the dreams and plans of the future trapped in your heart to get up to speed with your head.

((StillLivin))

Skan posted 9/14/2013 15:30 PM

It hurts because, deep down inside, we all hope for redemption, that they will come to their senses. And even if we tell ourselves that this is it, we hope that they will show some signs of being the person that we thought we knew, that we thought we married, that we thought loved us.

The good news, is that every time they stab us like this, the healing forms a bigger callus so that eventually indifference develops.

In your case, since he's already moved the OW in, there is no reason to file for divorce immediately. Get out and get what you're owed before he spends more of YOUR money on her. (((hugs)))

Pippy posted 9/14/2013 16:09 PM

Down deep we all subconsciously hold on to the hope they'll come back and make it right. It's not until you can let that go that you can truly heal. It took me 8 years. Now he just doesn't matter any more.

[This message edited by Pippy at 4:09 PM, September 14th (Saturday)]

Thefly559 posted 9/14/2013 16:27 PM

Guess I am in the same boat , don't have an answer and if you find one please let me know. Just letting you know I'm here with you and share your pain. Be well

StillLivin posted 9/14/2013 16:34 PM

So Much Insight. Thank You Everybody. I Cried Long And Hard. I'm Exhausted. Tomorrow Is Another Day.
And Skan, I Already Nailed His Ass To The Cross And Drove The NailsIn Deep Before He Even Walked Out The Door.
I Still Love Him So Much, But Nobody Effs Me OveR And Betrsys Me Like That Without A Price. What My Stbxh Miscalculated Was My Animal Instinct For Survival.
He Will Be Paying Half The Mortgage Until I Feel Like Selling. And He Will Give Me Spousal Support Until I Say Otherwise.

StillLivin posted 9/14/2013 16:36 PM

I Just Wanted To Say I Really Love You Guys!!!