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Newest Member: aoife (50534)

User Topic: Limbo Sucks
♀ 40624
Member # 40624
Default  Posted: 5:17 PM, September 14th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Limbo sucks, and I feel like it will never end. I really don't want my marriage to end in divorce. I want us to heal ourselves, but my husband is so wrapped around his guilt and his addiction to her.

I need to find my way out of limbo for myself and my girls, but I don't even know where to start.

Did anyone else suffer through this limbo stage? He's feeling too sorry for himself to be of any use to me, and I just want to start moving past the pain.

BW - 44 - SAHM
WH - 45 - 3 year LTA
Blended family - 2 school aged "ours" children left at home.
DDay (which one?) all in 2013
Reconciling - as best we can

Posts: 205 | Registered: Sep 2013 | From: Southwest US (Tucson)
mom of 2
♀ 11214
Member # 11214
Default  Posted: 6:10 PM, September 14th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Me! I was in limbo for 18 EXCRUCIATING months. It was pure hell. ANY decision is better than no decision at all. I can't tell you what is right for you but I can tell you I agree that limbo sucks.

Me: BW
Divorced after 23 years of M thanks to XH's truth trickle.
Status: Recovering and healing. It's going to be a long hard road.

Update November 2013: It only took seven years but I finally turned a corner. :)

Posts: 13386 | Registered: Jul 2006 | From: The suburbs of hell
♀ 31349
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 6:55 PM, September 14th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

We have a thread in our I Can Relate forum for BS's in Limbo:

It doesn't move as quickly as others but you can get support from members who are in a similar situation, or at least read about others who have been in your shoes. Somehow the "company" makes the limbo a bit more bearable.

As far as getting out - it may feel daunting to think about uprooting overnight - or even in a month. The best advice I've been given is to take very small steps towards your ultimate goal. Whether that means saving money somewhere protected, getting in touch with a lawyer for advice, or just re-learning how to take care of yourself, every little thing can add up to a healthier life after time.

Sending big hugs.

"And above all things, never think that you're not good enough yourself. A man should never think that. My belief is that in life people will take you at your own reckoning."
- I. Asimov

Posts: 25479 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
Topic Posts: 3

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