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Overnight sleeping arrangments? (Non-Custodial Parent)

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dlmos posted 9/16/2013 10:52 AM

Little Background: xWW is the custodial parent. Both my kids are special needs and we didn't want them uprooted from their school as it has a great program, or be moved from the marital home. In order for xWW to be able to afford the home I took the marital debt on. It was not "fair", but it was a decision I made in the best interest of my kids. Due to this I am currently living with my parents till I can pay down the debt.

So the good news... I'm almost ready to get my own place! I'm looking at spring after I've seen how my taxes will hit.

The issues is that I will likely be moving into a 1 bedroom apartment until I can pay off the remainder of the debt at which point I will see about a larger place. xWW is good with this as the kids only have overnight visits on every third saturday due to my shift schedule. I've been trying to see what kind of sleeping arrangments I can make for them until I can get a larger place. I want them to feel at home, but everything will have to be packed up during the rest of the month. Also when I do get a larger 2 bedroom apartment has anyone seen good options for a combined boy/girls room? Or what age range a combined room would no longer be appropriate?

gahurts posted 9/16/2013 11:07 AM

When my DD22 was a teenager, her mother set up a room with one of those room dividers (sort of like a cubicle) so that she had a private area. You might be able to get something like to split a room so that they each have some privacy.

traildad posted 9/16/2013 11:12 AM

I can't specifically tell you what will work in a one bedroom place, but I will share what I am doing.

I have three kids, ages 7 (boy), 6 (girl), and 4 (boy). I live in a two bedroom condo. They all share one bedroom. It has worked out fine so far. The boys are in a bunk bed and my daughter has her own bed. However, my daughter is getting very close to the age that I feel she will need her own room. I am searching for a larger place. I have them 50% of the nights, so it needs to be more permanent. If I had them less, say every other weekend, I would probably give my daughter her own room and have the boys camp out in my room when they were over. If they continue to share a room, I am going to try to give my daughter some private space somewhere in the home.

Perhaps when they sleep at your one bedroom place you can have a futon, etc that you can pull out for them. Good luck.

lieshurt posted 9/16/2013 12:11 PM

When my DD22 was a teenager, her mother set up a room with one of those room dividers (sort of like a cubicle) so that she had a private area. You might be able to get something like to split a room so that they each have some privacy.

I used to have a friend who did the same thing. She blocked off her dining room and set it up as a small bedroom. She didn't have to worry about putting things up/away because she used the divider to hide that space. She put a day bed with a trundle in there, so that her daughter could also have a sleepover guest spend the night.

TrustedHer posted 9/16/2013 12:57 PM

My son has a 1 bedroom apartment and I've been considering getting him one of these for my granddaughter:

I figure she can take it with her when she moves out/goes to college.

Not cheap, but you get a desk that turns easily into a bed when you need it. I'm considering buying the hardware kit and doing the woodworking myself.

How about twin beds for the 1 bedroom, a divider like a Japanese screen, and the desk/bed for the living room. You move to the living room when the kids are there, and keep the bedroom when they aren't. Two twins could be pushed together to be a sort-of King bed.

You can also buy bunk beds that are twin on top and double or queen on bottom.

cmego posted 9/16/2013 13:06 PM

My ex has the kids e/o weekend, and that is 4 days a month. He has a 2 bedroom condo and put bunk beds in the second bedroom. My kids are 10 (girl) and almost 8 (boy). They share that room still without issue. I'd say he has about 2 more years for that to work. My dd is a late bloomer, so I think that once puberty really hits in, it is time for separate rooms or some other sleeping arrangement.

How about a pull out sofa bed?? You can put an egg carton foam thing to make it more comfortable, as well as some have great mattresses now...

Undefinabl3 posted 9/16/2013 13:11 PM

At one point i lived in a one bedroom apartment with a den. it was not a area sepearated by a door, but it would have been large enough for a futon and it already had built in storage area.

This could be an option to screen off the den area.

Also, most states stay that 5 or 6 years old is the limit for same sex shared rooms.

Weatherly posted 9/16/2013 14:15 PM

What about those bunk beds that are a twin on top and a futon type full size on the bottom? You could share with the boys and give the girl a pullout in the living room? put the bed in the living room and not have to buy a sofa and give the girl the bedroom.

My boys and I used to live in one ROOM, that was it. They had a full size loft bed, underneath was my desk and their dresser. Then, off to the other side of the room I had a sleeper love seat I slept on. Their bed was out of the way, mine became seating.

It wasn't ideal, but it ended up working for about a year until I got a different place. Would anything like that work?

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