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tesla posted 9/16/2013 22:56 PM

Teslet painted this picture tonight.

I asked him what it was about. He said it was him and his dad and that his dad was going to live in the house I built. He said dad was broken. I asked why dad was broken, he said because his leg is cracked and now he has to walk with a cane. (No injuries to ex-shat in real life.)
I told him it's a lovely picture and that we could hang it in his room when it dries. Teslet insists that it should be hung in my room.
I will never cease to be amazed by how he makes sense of his world.
It's hard for me not to read too much into the fact that he portrayed and described his dad as broken. I'm careful not to talk about ex-shat when Teslet is awake, but maybe he overheard me say something recently? Or maybe he just knows something is not quite right with his dad. Or maybe he just painted a picture. I tend to over analyze.

Nature_Girl posted 9/16/2013 23:01 PM

That picture gives me chills.

PhantomLimb posted 9/16/2013 23:09 PM


How old is he? I don't think it's over-analyzing to say he's picking up on something.

MissMouseMo posted 9/16/2013 23:27 PM

I find the picture and the story achingly beautiful. I am so moved I would like to save a copy of it if you wouldn't mind.

Feeling Consumed posted 9/17/2013 00:36 AM

Wow. He definitely has an artistic streak in him.

It also looks like it is raining over his dad, but the sun is directly above Teslet. And Teslet's arms are outstretched, but his dad's are hanging down to his side. I can over analyze too! :)

sinsof thefather posted 9/17/2013 08:21 AM

Wow. He definitely has an artistic streak in him.

I agree. Quite apart from the amazing insight of it - it actually does look like he has a genuine artistic talent to me.

ajsmom posted 9/17/2013 08:56 AM

I'm careful not to talk about ex-shat when Teslet is awake, but maybe he overheard me say something recently?

That's my guess.

Broken is a pretty hard concept for a kid his age to get, especially when he didn't specify which part of his dad he thinks is broken.

My guess is he heard it in some very general way.


Chrysalis123 posted 9/17/2013 11:21 AM

Or, he believes dads are supposed to live with kids and moms. Since his dad does not, he takes it to mean dad is broken...instead of himself.

I think the blue lines indicate the sky.

SBB posted 9/18/2013 03:49 AM

Broken is a pretty hard concept for a kid his age to get, especially when he didn't specify which part of his dad he thinks is broken.

^^THIS. Unless he knows someone who has had a broken leg recently? My girls tend to use new info in their art stories and incorporate it into their own life.

Kajem posted 9/18/2013 04:37 AM

He's insightful.

Why is he insisting it needs to go in your room?

roughroadahead posted 9/18/2013 05:14 AM

Art therapy is a thing. DS7 has an art therapist at school. It is very similar to what Teslet did with that picture. Kids draw something, and it is often meaningful to them no matter how run-of-the-mill the picture seems. As SBB said, they sometimes incoporate new info as a way of processing things and absorbing new info. I believe art therapists can analyze themes and such over a series of pics too.

It seems like he's working through some concepts with his pictures. Probably shouldn't over-analyze, but it is good to let him draw what he wants without making a big deal and let him talk through what he thinks is going on.

macakipa posted 9/18/2013 06:44 AM

I am awed by his depth in understanding and meaning. Precious

Crescita posted 9/18/2013 15:10 PM

My thinking from this is that your ex is probably way over sharing adult concerns with teslet and this is how he interprets it. Perhaps he talks about the new house he is trying to buy, but woe is ex, he is broke and needs your help (aka drop the "law suit").

npain posted 9/18/2013 15:24 PM

Even though it would be a safe bet not to over-analyze, it is my firm belief that kids pick up WAY more than we give them credit for. They may not be able to express it, or fully understand it, but they get cues.

My DD was 4 at the time of DDay and one day she said "Mommy, now there are two people who are not around anymore, Daddy and OW!" I nearly peed myself because I realize if she were a little older she might have put the pieces together.

Grace and Flowers posted 9/18/2013 16:05 PM

What a great painting.

It looks to me like he's trying to "herd" his dad back home.

tesla posted 9/18/2013 17:53 PM

THanks for all the thoughts...I'm sure he did hear broken in a general way and put it in...but hearing the story at my level of understanding just makes it all the more interesting. I must say, I really enjoy listening to him tell me about his artwork...although I'm sure that he's working through some tough things. In another pic he did he had dad (just dad portrayed) camping at the beach. Dad doesn't go camping and he's never taken Teslet to the beach...that's what we do together.

I just try to take note of it. I don't make a big deal out of it. And of course he could just be smearing color together and I would still think it's the most beautiful picture in the world.

I have no idea why he is insisting that the one in this thread go in my room. I've still got both of them sitting in the living room, figured I'd just wait for him to mention them again.

Melody3 posted 9/18/2013 21:23 PM

Continue to let this this child paint, draw, mold clay, sandplay, etc........It is SO good for them to express themselves.

EVERY piece of art has meaning.

My daughter at age 5 said "daddy made a choice." She knew. No one told her. She's very bright and knew and told her counselor that daddy made a choice to leave. She was reminded it had nothing to do with her or her brother. It stuck.

I don't think he overheard anything. He is putting concepts in his head into his art.......

Melody3 posted 9/18/2013 21:25 PM

My daughter's counselor always using play and art therapy in her sessions.

tryingagain74 posted 9/18/2013 21:53 PM

You know what else struck me? He said that he and his dad were going to live in a house that YOU built. ETA: I also like how you are symbolically represented as the house-- the warm, safe haven against the rain outside.

I took that to mean that not only is Dad broken, but if I take him back to Mom, the strong and reliable one that I can count on, maybe she can fix Dad?

Plus, he wants you to hang it in your room... maybe hoping that, deep down, you'll welcome back his dad?

The thing that our ex-morons completely fail to acknowledge is that the pseudo-mommies they've installed in their children's lives are NOT substitutes for their real moms. My kids have said things like "I wish Dad and [the Owife] would get divorced so that you two could get married again" or "I wish Dad would love you again so that you could get remarried." Of course, I tell them that there is no chance of our reuniting, but it doesn't matter-- even if the step parent is awesome (which she isn't in my case or in yours), they still nurture that little hope that we'll get back together with their dads.

[This message edited by tryingagain74 at 9:54 PM, September 18th (Wednesday)]

nomistakeaboutit posted 9/18/2013 21:56 PM

It looks like he is trying to HELP his father. He built a house for him. Maybe he wants the picture to hang in your room so that you can see how his father is hurt and needs help. Maybe your son is feeling the negative vibes coming from you and is trying to sensitize you to his father's pain and need of help, as he sees it.

[This message edited by nomistakeaboutit at 9:57 PM, September 18th (Wednesday)]

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