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hangingontohope7 posted 9/17/2013 10:29 AM

A called my attorney yesterday regarding the D paperwork that I was recently served. The L told me that since there really isn't any contention regarding dividing assets that we can file for the D after the 90 waiting period.

Umm... say what? I told him that while there may not be much difficulty splitting up our property, there is an issue with health benefits. I was a SAHM, who just recently went back to work PT. I don't have an option for health insurance through my employer. He did tell me that there are options such as asking STBXWH to pay for a private plan for a set period of time or writing in a contingency that we agree to the division of property but will not actually file for the D until a later date to be established or until I find FT employment. Or, if STBXWH doesn't agree either of those that then we artificially drag it until I'm ready to file. The problem with that last option is that I'm forking out more fees to my A. We haven't really proposed anything yet but the whole thing has me pissed off.

I couldn't keep the house because I can't afford it on my own. So, now he is going to refinance it and live there with OW. I've lost some of my furniture because I had no place to store it and why the hell would I want it now that OW has used it. Now, its the health insurance and being forced to give up a job that I enjoy and that provides me with a set schedule that works around my children.

It just never ends. And, those are just material things. Don't even get me started on the fact that I have to give up time spent with my kids. Nights when I don't get to tuck them into bed. All because STBXWH wanted some action on the side and fell in "luv."

I know it does no good to complain about it because it won't make it go away. It won't fix all these problems that have been dumped in my lap. But it's just so damn unfair. I keep telling myself that one day, after all this difficulty and hard work, I will have my OWN home, my OWN furniture, my OWN life and no one will be able to take it away from me.

sleepless34 posted 9/17/2013 11:27 AM

Oh, hangingontohope7, so sorry. I am right there with you in this boat.

It is so unfair. It totally sucks. Your life, your kids lives, the home, the job, the money, the safety and security- all of it taken away by the actions of a selfish, pathetic, weak husband.

It is so incredibly selfish. I will never, ever understand how someone can do this to the person he vowed to love, honor and protect. It is so disrespectful, so hurtful.

If they want out, fine, there are better ways to handle it. Having an A for sex and then falling "in love with" some whore and then willing to risk their whole life and the lives of their partner and children- for what? A fresh start? A do over? WTF.

I will never get it. I guess there are just two types in the world, Givers and Takers. Takers take- they F*** others over if it gets in the way of their own needs.

I am so sorry for what you are going through. That totally sucks. The thought of some whore sitting on your furniture in your house is discusting. SO UNFAIR! sorry!