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seenow posted 9/19/2013 17:29 PM

4 months since dday. I feel like I should be able to make a decision but I am not even sure what happened to me yet. 4 months. Long and not long. If I were young and without a child I would be gone. I am 45 and been with him 24 years. It's not easy to leave or to stay. DAMN!!!! damn damn damn damn damn.....

sparklezombie posted 9/19/2013 17:45 PM

I'm in the same boat. Leaving sucks and staying sucks. Life sucks.

Hugs

LiedtoLucy posted 9/19/2013 17:49 PM

ditto...

Morhurt posted 9/19/2013 18:05 PM

Ugh, I'm sorry. It's so F*ing hard isn't it?
I'm staying (at least for now) but only because of H's actions.

What do your WS's actions say? Are you guys in IC?

I hope you get some clarity.

seenow posted 9/19/2013 18:18 PM

His actions now are not as loud as his actions were. Everyone can do something for a minute. I don't trust he has "changed". I have to trust myself and I don't trust I could handle if he did it again. There, right there is the problem.

undonelife posted 9/19/2013 18:57 PM

Ditto here. 10 months out. I stay for my kids. I hate my life. 30 years invested.

undonelife posted 9/19/2013 19:00 PM


His actions now are not as loud as his actions were. Everyone can do something for a minute. I don't trust he has "changed". I have to trust myself and I don't trust I could handle if he did it again. There, right there is the pro
blem.

Oh wow. What a good way to put it. Yes. That's how I feel.

InRetrospect posted 9/19/2013 19:03 PM

Here's how it is for me: if he ever EVER does this shit again, I am gone. Even after 23 years. And he knows that. I have forgiven too much already, if you ask me.

Hang in there, and hugs.

inmisery1 posted 9/19/2013 23:07 PM

6 weeks out from dday. 2nd whore in 3 years. Together for 27 years. I hate his mother fu***** guts.

mandan66 posted 9/19/2013 23:20 PM

ditto also from my end. We are exactly 1 week away from the D being final, and after being fairly composed for the last few months, I'm starting to freak out a little more now. My STBWW is in full out freaking mode.

crazynot posted 9/20/2013 00:19 AM

I didn't have the choice to stay - he left in the end and did me a huge favour in doing so. I am happy in my life. I went through years of misery and suspicion with him, a breakdown when he told me he was in love with OW, and really discovered a new me and a new life when he was gone. Never stay because of your age or because of the kids...

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