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libertyrocks (original poster member #38924) posted at 10:11 PM on Friday, September 20th, 2013
Did anyone take meds to make them feel better? I feel like that's where I'm at right now...
What are your opinions, thoughts, experiences??
Me-37 Ws-37
2 kids
Dday Nov 2012, TT for a year.
Reconciling for the third time in 4 years.
crazyblindsided ( member #35215) posted at 10:44 PM on Friday, September 20th, 2013
Oh my god I could not have survived without them. I am on an AD and Mood Stabilizer.
fBS/fWS(me):52 Mad-hattered after DD (2008)
XWS:55 Serial Cheater, Diagnosed NPD
DD(22) DS(19)
XWS cheated the entire M spanning 19 years
Discovered D-Days 2006,2008,2012, False R 2014
Separated 9/2019; Divorced 8/2024
libertyrocks (original poster member #38924) posted at 10:47 PM on Friday, September 20th, 2013
Really, crazy???? I didn't know. I think I need them. I'm so up and down. It sucks. For me and for him.
Me-37 Ws-37
2 kids
Dday Nov 2012, TT for a year.
Reconciling for the third time in 4 years.
Kelany ( member #34755) posted at 10:52 PM on Friday, September 20th, 2013
Yep. I'm on Lexapro. I was on the edge hanging by a thread.
BS - Me
SA/FWH Him
DDay 1 - Jul 11
DDay 2 - Jul 12
R Dec 12
Former 80s Icon wishful thinking
libertyrocks (original poster member #38924) posted at 10:55 PM on Friday, September 20th, 2013
Thanks for sharing Sam. I'm so gonna get them. Good thing I don't drink. lol. Maybe I should. I'm just kidding!! 
[This message edited by libertyrocks at 4:55 PM, September 20th (Friday)]
Me-37 Ws-37
2 kids
Dday Nov 2012, TT for a year.
Reconciling for the third time in 4 years.
LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 10:56 PM on Friday, September 20th, 2013
I was on Prozac for about 15 months. It was one of the factors that saved my life. I was dealing with horrible, horrible depression, and was at the end of my rope.
I think it was also critical for me to continue with therapy, reading, and participating in this web site in order to truly heal. The meds were just kind of a band-aid to get me through until I could get to a better and more stable spot. And when I say "band-aid", I mean they were a really, really big band-aid.
Best of luck, and definitely heed your doc's advice if you go that route.
crazyblindsided ( member #35215) posted at 12:47 AM on Saturday, September 21st, 2013
I'm so up and down.
The up and down won't be so high or so low anymore on the medication. The moods become more manageable.
I had severe depression and was at the end of my rope, this was in June of 2012. I attempted suicide and kept spiraling until we found the right medication. Sometimes it's not always the first one you try either.
fBS/fWS(me):52 Mad-hattered after DD (2008)
XWS:55 Serial Cheater, Diagnosed NPD
DD(22) DS(19)
XWS cheated the entire M spanning 19 years
Discovered D-Days 2006,2008,2012, False R 2014
Separated 9/2019; Divorced 8/2024
Nest2007 ( member #39532) posted at 1:17 AM on Saturday, September 21st, 2013
I was diagnosed with severe anxiety and depression 1 month post DDay. The medication has been a godsend!
BS 35
WS 31
DD, only child
DDay: 06/09/13
End of TT/Full Disclosure 07/08/13
Reconciling. A stronger marriage now.
Psalm 37. It rocks my world. So does 140. Big guy upstairs has got it all figured out.
torn2pieces ( new member #39029) posted at 1:41 AM on Saturday, September 21st, 2013
I know that i would not been able to deal well without meds . either. i think it made me not so reactive when my kids were around which im thankful for!
ItsaClimb ( member #37107) posted at 6:31 AM on Saturday, September 21st, 2013
{libertyrocks} I am also headed towards going on meds. I have been scarily down the last couple of weeks. I don't know why I have been so anti going on meds, I have resisted it all the way, but I think it's now time. Hoping we can both find something that works for us!
BS 52
Together 35 yrs, M 31 years
2 daughters 30yo(married with 2 children) & 25yo
D-Day 18 Aug 2012
6mth EA lead to 4mth PA with CO-W. I found out 8 1/2 yrs later
hpv50 ( member #39703) posted at 2:40 AM on Sunday, September 22nd, 2013
I spiraled downward for 8 weeks (while my WH gaslighted me), unknowingly into a severe depression. I didn't realize I was in one until I started IC, and my shrink diagnosed me in the first ten minutes.
Sometimes we're the last ones to realize that we need some outside help in the form of meds. In my case, I was very leery of taking anything because my mother was a prescription drug addict.
Now I'm taking viibryd, which is a fairly new ssri without the usual side effects - no weight gain nor much of a reduced sex drive. You may want to try a few different types until you find one that works well for you.
Anti-depressants help take away the lows, without impacting the ups. Other than that, I basically feel like I normally do. They also help you healthily detach from the A. They won't make you placid, though (I was worried about that).
Me: BS - 50; Him: WH - 53, covert NPD/ BPD
married 19 years, 3 kids
DD1 4/22/13 (hpv diagnosis)
DD2 5/9/13
Status: relocated my happy; hanging in there for now
married2stranger ( member #34492) posted at 4:37 AM on Monday, September 23rd, 2013
I was diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder as well as Anxiety disorder (and a whole heap of other issues) pre-A.
Like others have said sometimes you have to try different AD's to find the right one. Everyone has a different chemistry and what works for one person may not be as effective for another. It includes trial and error to find the right meds, I have been on several.
I NEED to warn against one particular! EFFEXOR, PLEASE DO NOT LET YOUR DOCTOR PRESCRIBE THIS MEDICATION!!!
Typically Effexor is prescribed to SSRI resistant depression, after at least 3 other SSRI's have been ineffective. I was prescribed Effexor after being hospitalized for attempted suicide (directly following Dday) and the WITHDRAWAL symptoms are excruciating. Daily I feel like my brain is being electrocuted, it is terrible to get off of.
I loathe this drug, and WARN ANYONE, to look into the side effects (specifically withdrawal) before even considering this option. Unfortunately I wasn't "able" to research this medication before beginning treatment, and am now going through HELL just to get off of it!
D-Day - 10/22/2011
Married 5/29/2004 together 13years!
(Me)"I've been called worse"....
(WH)"Oh yeah, like what?"
(Me)"YOUR wife!!!"
myperfectlife ( member #39801) posted at 4:49 AM on Monday, September 23rd, 2013
I've never even considered going on AD before this and hesitated much longer than I should. I went through 4 months on my own. I wish I would have gotten my script sooner.
I am on a very low dose of Prozac and I will say it has saved my sanity 1000 times over.
I hope to be off them within a year, but will do whatever keeps me sane.
Don't hesitate if you feel like you need it.
It has been an armour of cotton between my head and my heart and has made a world of difference.
I cannot be responsible for another's personal growth.
DDay#1 of a "cheatillion" 4/1/13
Divorce final 11/04/13
fraeuken ( member #30742) posted at 6:03 AM on Monday, September 23rd, 2013
I am on Lexapro. It has been a lifesaver for me. I went off it with my doctor's help but the depression kicked back in.
I am back on a very low dose and the ups- and downs are a much more leveled out.
I also have severe anxiety at times. I do take Ativan when I feel that coming on; I am very careful with the use of it because it can be habit forming but it helps me tremendously when I have a serious anxiety attack.
Make sure you talk this through with your doctor on a regular basis.
Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.
shatteredheart7 ( member #39734) posted at 2:24 PM on Monday, September 23rd, 2013
OH YES! I don't know if I would have ever made it out of bed without meds! And I am not usually a med person. I hate taking anything. But I love my AD.
Me~40
FWH~46
Married 8yrs
Together 11 1/2
Me~ 3 kids, 21,17,14
Him~no kids
A with a mutual "friend" for 2+yrs
He confessed 9/9/12
A was over 2/12
7/13~ Happier than we have been in yrs!
Tred ( member #34086) posted at 2:40 PM on Monday, September 23rd, 2013
Liberty,
I avoided meds for 14 months. When I was diagnosed with PTSD, I was put on Prozac. I started on the lowest dose, and gradually upped it until I stabilized. I haven't had any side effects and I was able to stop the daily sobbing routine. In my opinion, do what you need to do to survive.
Married: 27 years (14 @JFO) D-Day: 11/09/11"Ohhhhh...shut up Tred!" - NOT the official SI motto (DS)
HurtButHopeful? ( member #25144) posted at 6:52 AM on Wednesday, September 25th, 2013
I also went on AD meds for a couple of years. I also needed sleeping pills. I'm off the AD meds, and only take the sleeping pills about half the time. I'm not a med person either, but they kept me sane and from killing myself, literally.
Resources for R:
His Needs Her Needs, by Dr. Willard Harley
Love Busters, by Dr. Willard Harley
(for husbands) Becoming the Ultimate Husband, by Reb Bradley
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