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What questions did you ask?

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SoOver96 posted 9/20/2013 20:41 PM

I still have questions I don't know actually what are the right questions To ask

My friend says she ran into him and gutter fish troll at a gas station she and I've racked my brain what should I ask first thing I told him he needs to write a no contact letter and send it to it if WS is truly wanting to be with me he needs to do everything i ask and willing to do it by any means right I will be getting tested again... I told he needs to make his choice because he won't be getting his cake and eatting it too he says he chooses me but again it's to early to see should I ask for him to change his number as soon as he gets his guy friends contacts on his phone

Gemini71 posted 9/20/2013 21:40 PM

Make yourself a list of what you need to have happen in order to attempt R. That way when you ask the million dollar question, WS knows what he's getting into. Also be prepared for the answer to not be what you expect, or for WS to say "I'd like to R, but I can't do A B and C." A NC letter to AP and changing phone #s seems to be a common requirement, and its really not that much to ask of WS.

Keep in mind that you are entitled to change the list anytime you see fit. I made a R requirements list for my STBXH. However, I later learned about another PA, this one with my BFF. It was a deal breaker.

R is a gift you can choose to give...or not.

HardenMyHeart posted 9/20/2013 22:09 PM

Here is a link to a good article by Shirley Glass titled, 10 Questions to Ask Your Unfaithful Spouse:
http://www.ivillage.com/10-questions-ask-your-unfaithful-spouse/6-a-126599

Ostrich80 posted 9/20/2013 22:32 PM

Take your time and really think through what you want to know. I sat on my knowledge for a few days to be calm but once I cut loose, I still can't remember what I said. I really wish I would have written down my questions. He would have still lied but at least I could remember ed the conversation better. Just remember it was quite loud.

SoOver96 posted 9/20/2013 22:52 PM

Thank you all I really wished he'd just tell me the truth he said he doesn't mind doing the nc but I don't know how he'll react when I ask to change the number he doesn't know how to set a cell phone up so I set it up I'm not worried about him having another phone I put babe as first name and for last name I put Wife in all caps and for company I put queen of (last name) household lol

dov46 posted 9/21/2013 01:40 AM

SoOver: Am I reading this right...he is still w/OW? If so...it really doesn't matter what you want to ask...if he's still in contact/physically with her...there's no point in asking questions:(

SoOver96 posted 9/21/2013 13:49 PM

No I got an email from a friend stating about him being seen with her in two towns over which takes 35 mins to get too he stats he was in our nieghborhood with friends which majority of them are quite older except two he blew out his knee he couldn't of gone far either way

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