I just want to know where the the WS here have found the courage to stop TTruthing and really confront the magnitude of what they have done
I actually see a lot of hope in the way you phrased this. The fact that we as WS peddled bits and pieces of the truth really is in large part about not confronting that truth in our own minds and hearts. You know it's there, rotting and emitting poison like nuclear waste, but the thought of diving into it is abhorrent. And it should be, because the stuff down there, the things you did, the weaknesses and the flaws, all can be very ugly.
For me and for my FBS (who is also a FWS), it was about acknowledging that you will have no control over the outcome of your honesty. You can't "control the situation" and your BS has the right to react in whatever way they will, including leaving you if that's what's best for them. That's their right as a human being. And it's also your right as a human being to deal with your own demons. But none of that can start until you both know what you're really dealing with.
The courage for me came from stringing it out until I thought my husband would leave me, and we agreed that this would just happen right now. BH was at the "now or never" point, so my back was against the wall. I do not recommend letting it get to that point, because it was an added layer of pressure and much harder than had I chosen the time with any amount of integrity. By the way, years later and we still feel the ache that I let it get that far before being honest. (later, when my BH became a WH, he actually remembered that moment through his fog and manned up much faster than I had)
Anyway, kids went to grandparents for the weekend and on a friday night we talked. I had some words written on a sheet, maybe someone might call it a mantra, doesn't matter what it said, but the second I felt my mind turning away from something I'd look at it and plow on.
It takes guts, but its also along the lines of lancing a boil and letting the pressure out. It's ugly and gross but necessary. And you have the support of the people here who have been where you are.
I wasn't into lying, that wasn't my particular vice, but I was heavily into manipulating situations with selective truths. It was a way I had of controlling the outcome of my interactions with people, including my BH. I didn't even know there was any other way to be. So I completely relate to you saying you wonder if you've lost the ability to be honest. Rebuilding from that point actually feels exactly like "rebuilding". It's like you have to take far flung pieces and stack them into the shape of an honest person, and then self understanding, true belief that this is the right way to be, and in my case a lot of repetition and experience became the mortar that actually made me closer to that 'honest person shape'. Work in progress, but I'm happy with what I've built so far.
Why don't you post more here and get a supportive community around you, so you can build up some momentum towards where you want to be?