I took off my wedding ring after finding out some Trickle Truths last week. I don't even know if he noticed, and is avoiding saying something for fear that I'll be a puddle of sobbing woman or rip him a new one, or if he just hasn't noticed because he is often clueless--like when the dog was on his lap and getting ready to vomit, but WH was watching that box with the moving pictures inside it!
Our 33rd wedding anniversary is in Dec. I don't plan on having it be anything other than a normal day.
I also removed all photos of *us.* Not a word said so far, so I"m not sure if he noticed. His other nickname (other than Happy Hank) is Mr. Oblivious.
I did announce to him that we're not celebrating any birthdays or anniversaries or anything--back in Feb when I thought it was just an 8 month A, I was willing to make my gift list quite long to try to balance out the universe, y'know, but after finding out it was a LTA of 7 years, cards and gifts are meaningless right now. I got cards and gift while he was seeing the skank whore.
This is too recent for me to know if this feeling will ever go away. He is trying and I can see that.
Sometimes I have to deliberately tell him my expectations and practically spell it out, like tonight: "It would be thoughtful if you asked if I needed a fork instead of just taking your dinner and sitting down, and to ask if I would like a beverage with our dinner."
I said it very calmly, & added that he probably wasn't aware of it, but being more aware and thoughtful would go a long way with showing me I'm important in his life.
I doubt I'll ever be in love with him like I used to be, but we are both in the beginnings of MC and in IC. He used to be a good person. How on earth did he wake up stupid at age 57?
Are you going to MC or IC? Have you done the 180? This kind of hurt goes deep, ((((Labmom123).
[This message edited by Hope2B at 2:41 AM, September 23rd (Monday)]